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Now obviously this isn’t a complete list and I could go on for days, but these tips proved to be the most important bits of dating advice I shared with my own teen daughters over the years. So use this as a jumping-off point and just start the conversation. Add your own advice and the opinions of the people you trust and then just keep talking. Others feel that dating can be a positive experience for teens provided they are mature enough and the parents know and trust the dating partner. Before deciding how you’re going to proceed, it’s crucial to realize that contemporary dating is radically different from what it was when the majority of today’s parents were kids. 9 Tips for Talking to Teens about Dating and Relationships February 27, 2015 • By GoodTherapy.org Staff. ... As we near the end of Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, we want to remind parents ... Coping with Teen Dating – Tips for Parents Most parents have some fears of the day their child will start dating. It is the big sign that they’re growing up and are entering adulthood. Unfortunately, too often teens start dating with no preparatory talks from their parents and then they can get into trouble. According to Planned Parenthood, about 10 percent of teenage girls in ... I. 17 Dating Tips For Teenage Guys. If you’re single and dating, you may be surprised to know that the dating tips are actually quite deep and unlimited. First dates can make most of us anxious, especially for teenagers. Teenage is one of the most unforgettable periods in any boy’s life. Relationship advice for teenage girls that can make things much better and happier . Dating and falling in love with someone are two different things. Both of them generally happen in teenage for the first time. Being in relationship is an amazing feeling and if you are having this feeling at teenage, it is beyond imagination. Love can take you to new highs -- and new lows. You may have the strongest feelings of your life, which is great when things are good. But if things go bad, it’s devastating. Here are six dating tips to help you keep your head during this exciting time. Dating Tip 1: Take Your Time. Some teens date, some don’t. 3) Encourage Variety: Teenage dating is a great opportunity for the young person to figure out what they want (and don't want) from a relationship, as well as learn more about who they are and the areas in which they need to grow.Encourage them to go out with many different people so they know what they want in a partner. In fact, make a rule that they cannot go out with the same person twice ... Seventeen has everything you've ever want to know about love and guys. From the best tips and advice to cute date ideas, we've got you covered when it comes to dating.
What was your first kiss like, and what can I expect from it?
2020.09.20 03:30 AluminumCoffeeWhat was your first kiss like, and what can I expect from it?
I’m a teenage (15 year old) boy and I might start dating a girl soon. I was just wondering what I should be expecting, what it’s like, and any tips you guys have for me.
2020.09.19 23:34 polyanxiousHow to find women to date, as a poly woman
In my teens and early 20s I dated women almost exclusively, while in poly relationships. I then entered a monogamous relationship. We broke up, and I've been able to explore new connections for the past five years. I've had no trouble getting attention from cis men, but what I'm really missing is a partner who defines as a woman. Issue is, I have NO interest from women. I consider myself engaging, and average to cute. I'm witty, if not snarky, with a full life. I send first messages always, I've flirted like mad at meets (pre-lockdown) and while I have a male partner we date separately and have no intention of finding 'a third'. He would never be involved and my profile on OKC makes that clear. Anyone got any tips for getting some female attention? Or any women who like women have tips on what makes them think, "hell yeah!" I feel like an awkward teenager.
2020.09.19 21:51 NatsuTheIVTifu by not socialising with the outer world
I am having problems contacting the ones I love or like. I am speaking to my friends that are roughly in my age all day since I go to school with them (I am 16 and sorry of my poorly written Story), I am going on a school where I am going to do my A levels specializing in computer science. We got Students with the age of 14 and other ones with an age from 18. I found friends really quickly since my mother language is Russian (although I am living in Germany), and we all had similar activities, gaming animes building pcs all that kinda stuff. First I thought that this was nice having so many friends on my new school but I am not sure yet... First of all, nobody, really nobody knows that I (was?) depressed and had multiple suicide attempts. Some old school friends had some thoughts but I wouldn't let them know. Now on the new school I started talking with people having same problems. Two of my friends are depressed but they didn't tried suicide, they live a happy life with gfs and so on. Or completely getting drunk and going on Partys. And at this point I wanted to change. I started doing sports, muscle training. I was not over the usual weight but I just started not knowing why. My old school friends started having fun at partys as well and every time they invited me I refuses or had an excuse not to come since I didn't feeled like I was someone who would enjoy it, or I'd rather say that people enjoy me. Now breaking contacts with them, was for sure not my best idea, but I don't Think I had any good ideas for the past few years. So now having even less contact with the outer world, I had a brilliant idea... again... I am living in a house block (5 buildings stacked in one direction). It is nice to live here, and my neighbours are even greater. We used to live in a smaller town, might be even a village and needed to change our home since the old landlord kicked us out. His daughter had no place to live, so he just got rid of one of his tenant and give them a home. It was us who got kicked out. Anyways, I am glad we living here. Our neighbours I mentioned earlier they were super nice and supportive with everything. And there was the one girl that I had much time spent with. In our neighbourhood there are nearly every weekend some nights where we play games and drink (not partying). And the girl was going ham every night I was there, she begun partying, dancing with me and I started drinking with her. That was the time before I got on my new school. Summer vacation started and the girl went with her family to Russia. But in only a week I found out it was a lie. The girl said we could not meet each other in the vacation, but the truth was only her mother went to Russia, because they bought a house there. I feeled kinda stupid, why should someone spent actually any time with me huh? But I had friends that wanted to spent time with me... I just refused to and I don't know why... So now going into the present day again, I tried to contact the girl again. I don't know why but they are still here, maybe they need more time to change home or they want that to finish school first. I texted her that I wanna meet her again, doing crazy stuff playing around hanging around the usual, and she didn't replied a day. Me a unsuccessful human being, googled on what to do with girls that don't respond to message back. A "good" tip I found was, text her if she got kidnapped or why she would not message you back. So you already know I tried that. Not a single message from that day either. Now I am stuck with my imagination, does she has a bf or am I just a weirdo that she don't wanna hang out with? (just to be clear, we didn't kissed, but we hugged each other and I really though that I was feeling importance for once). So in the time I tried contacting the girl I felt so lost that I tried to go on a date with another girl in my school/in my class. She is 2 years older than me. Me not knowing how to introduce myself, texted her aswell via WhatsApp since we got a class group so finding out her number was not such a big problem. I texted her who I am and I would really like to hang out with her. I got an message 5 hours later "sorry, but I have a boyfriend". Another time I feeled stupid and naiv. How does it come that I'm being so frustrated? Talking to my family isn't a option to be honest, I feel like they should not get involved since I even handled my depression alone over a few years and telling them would bring them in panicking. I am trying to forget the girl I fell in love and start doing my everyday things. But I can't just sleep over it. I can't start playing video games like I did everyday. I just don't have any energy or motivation. Sleeping feels like wasting time on repeat. Contacting my old school friends suddenly is going to be weird aswell. And I am not sure of what to do in school either. The girl that rejected me is looking at me in class like I was a demon and my friends don't know anything of it. Two of my old school friends are on the same school as my neighbour crush and I am just still going to feel weird/stupid. Now I only have myself and reddit to share my story about since I fked up. Thanks for reading this one sided story from my perspective, I try to read comments but now I am going to sleep... Regards, An common teenager TL;DR I messed up, having the big sad and having no one to talk about. Feeling like a loser and not important. Just because breaking contacts and not letting anyone in my life.
2020.09.19 19:44 OneSilverRavenRaven Reviews: IxSHE TELL Part 2, Love and War are NEVER Fair.
ALMOST A CHARACTER When looking back on the first part of this review after I had posted it I felt like perhaps I had given the protagonist (Ninomiya Hajime) a poor representation. P-kun, or Protagonist-kun if you prefer, is a term I use to describe a VNs POV character when they are... less then developed. This isn't necessarily a condemnation of a novel (Yukizakura is a pretty good novel with this type of protagonist) but I'd be lying if I said I didn't use the term derogatorily. I am not blind to the fact that the appeal of "blank slate" protagonists in this genre specifically is higher then most, but I think the evidence is overwhelming that more beloved novels have more developed protagonists. Shirogane Takeru, Toomi Yuna, Emiya Shirou and others might not be what most people think of when recalling their stories but their is no doubt in my mind replacing them with a vehicle for easier self insertion would have been a mistake, as each is crucial to the feel of the narrative. Depending upon your opinion of DDLC as a parody of traditional novels you might even reference its call outs of the POV character as recognition that the vast majority of VN protagonists are not only underdeveloped but participate in actions that from an outside perspective they have no motivation to do. So when I reference IxSHE Tell and its protagonist I feel slightly bad about including him on the same list as Takao Ibuki rather then giants like Okabe Rintarou because he has SOME personality at least. So i'll make a compromise, just this once. When I can justify it I'll refer to the protagonist by name, and when he slips into self insert territory I'll call him out for it with P-kun, so if you see me switching back and forth in this review that's why. Part 2 is going to cover my thoughts on the common route and its assets so lets dive right in and talk about the title screen. I DON'T THINK THAT CHAIR ACTUALLY APPEARS ONCE IN THE NOVEL IxSHE Tell starts almost immediately upon launch with a loud trumpet filled intro track over a picture of five girls tightly clustered in front of a posh throne. A few weeks ago when I published my first review of HuniePop I commented at length about my personal pet peeve for title cards and this one is... not very good. For starters the characters are much closer together then on the promotional art picture of the exact same scene (the characters even have the same poses) and that tightness clutters the left side of the menu uncomfortably. The picture on VNDB is MUCH better and not only lets each character breath more but puts emphasis on the empty seat which was presumably left open for the reader. The draped curtains in the background and the bright gold of the title clash with the music as the upbeat tempo and almost party like tone conflict with what looks to be a much calmer and upper class if unusual arrangement formed by the heroines. As a group shot, this title card fails to show anything but the most superficial traits of its subjects. I guess you could gather Kozuka is younger then the others from her expression and clothing but her personality doesn't really fit the tone she's putting off with her body language and saying you could guess Yamabuki is a tsudere or Yuuki is confident from their posture is a stretch at bast. Muv-Luv's title card isn't PERFECT but it's a much better example of how things can be done right in a group shot where every character has something unique to convey their personality to the reader. Pretend you've never seen either of these novels before and compare just these two images on VNDB, the list of things you can guess about one game's characters is easily triple the length of the other. So not a great omen for whats going to come but who knows maybe the title card at 100% completion will be better... BEING POPULAR AND FAMOUS In the past year of 201X (Seriously? Mega Man style date? What is this a secret Sci-Fi novel? If you're so worried about accurately depicting a level of technology just leave the year unspecified nobody cares! All you're doing with this is drawing attention to it.) the novel opens with a strange bit of narration in which the student newspaper (presumably) talks about the virtues of P-kun... okay. And tells the reader about him by calling him the hero student council president. So we know this novel isn't compensating for anything out of the gate at least I mean we're JUST the legendary president of the student council it's not like we're also drowning in women or anything... Anyway cut to an introduction to our first Heroine Yamabuki Yoshino presented with a cute title card claiming she "Can't fully hide her true feelings" so look forward to embarrassing the soul out of her all game. She's okay I guess, her introduction is twenty minutes of nagging P-kun in her capacity as vice president while everyone tells P-kun how great he is and stuff. Then she falls over for a pantsu CG and the whole thing is so forced and unbelievable it comes off as a joke which is REALLY not want I wanted my FIRST interaction with this girl to be like but hey maybe you like seeing strong women humiliated to the tune of epic suspenseful music more suited to a poorly done Lord of the Rings video game then a VN, no judgment. The rest of the student council, all one of them, is introduced (Hakuwa Shoukichi) as well as presumably the president (Kozuka Yui) and vice president (Ninomiya Aoba) of the neighboring sister school who's name is unimportant enough I'm not going to bother looking it up but it directly feeds its students into P-kun's academy so thats nice. Aoba is P-kun's sister and an adorable brat, she and Shoukichi spend the entire novel as one note characters i'll discuss in detail later but both are pretty enjoyable to have around. For story purposes all you need to know is Shoukichi has a crush on the school idle and does all the student council grunt work while Aoba is three steps down from spoiled rotten and oscillates between totally obnoxious and sickeningly sweet and clingy. Oh and she's friends with Yui I guess. Speaking of which Yui gets her own title card "Both childlike and mature" (THAT'S not code for anything) and has the best romance introduction in the game. Hajime pulls her aside and tells her that as a fellow student body president he wants to ask her for her advice. He's having doubts what he's doing is the right thing. Today's student council meeting was all about the abolition of the centuries old ban on romantic relationship he had pretty much single handedly championed and gotten passed and how it was going to affect the school. Yoshino, again, his vice president, had originally run against him as a supporter of the ban and still speaks out against it despite working with him diligently as he was the people's choice. Hajime expresses his fears for the future and openly questions if this new freedom will come at the cost of some people's comfort who will now be subject to unwanted advances. Yui's response is so well crafted I can't do it justice in this summery but she asks point blank if she is the only one who knows Hajime feels this way. When he reply's affirmatively she takes responsibility for all his fears, and dismisses them. As the only person who COULD blame him, by choosing not to she makes it so their is now no one who does. Again the scene is MUCH better then this but I still have over half the cast to introduce so take my word for it, GREAT first impression from Yui. Next comes Yuuki Ayaka, the school idol and two year winner of some beauty pageant. Apparently she's voiced by Oohashi Ayuru who is an idol herself which is a neat touch but her introduction here is UNBEARABLE... Her Heroine quirk is "Fary-Tale ideas of romance" which translates to referring to herself as "Perfect and Kawaii" every third paragraph and rejecting the advances of over a dozen guys, including poor Shoukichi, and some unnamed student directly in front of P-kun and Yui on their walk home. Realizing P-kun is there, she flat out presses her butt on his groin while saying to his face he, as the schools most popular boy, is the only man she could accept the confession of. Which prompts P-kun to freak out internally as he apparently has a crush on her and is a member of her "fan club" whatever that means. Apparently Ayaka and Yui know each other and Ayaka is teasingly warm to Yui's teasingly cold, bet that's going to come up later. Anyway P-kun gets Ayaka to blush after she DECIMATES poor off screen confession bro and the scene ends. We pick up with P-kun walking home with his childhood friend Hanamori Shiori who I THINK is the front runner for best hair but we'll have to see. Her quirk is "Madly in love, single-minded devotion," and she will oscillate between too shy to function and creepily obsessed with P-kun for the rest of the novel until the romance branches. Her scene here is completely forgettable and uninteresting because the only thing that matters is that you know she's P-kun's childhood friend. At the dorms Hajime and Shiori apparently live at together with Yoshino (Because THAT'S fair to the other heroines.) a new student is transferring in after the semester already started in true anime style and she immediately latches onto Hajime during their introduction. This is Koshimizu Kasumi, the apparent LOSER of best hair by popular vote which is a darn shame because the indigo tints on her tips are pretty cute, but that's a topic for later. Apparently she knew Hajime, Aoba and Shiori from their childhood where she was really sickly and Hajime would come visit her and bring her the schoolwork she missed. This left such a huge impression on the girl she developed her quirk "Pure, unabashed adoration" of Hajime and now that she's all better and able to go to public school again ten years after they met she's here to reunite with her white knight. Honestly it's a pretty touching story that feels a little rushed but OH BOY wait till we get the resolution to this one down the line it is going to get SO much more painful to read. But enough of that, it's time to meet the best character in the game Hanamori Yasumasa! Yasumasa is Shiori's little brother, which makes him YOUR little brother by right of childhood friendship, and he's adorable. Your introduction to him is at the last meeting of the club you preside over together hilariously called The Horny Brigadier Brotherhood with the sole goals of creating and maintaining a free, secure network to browse porn at the school and abolish the relationship ban. Today's meeting disbands the group as Hajime steps down from his position as general (Which is weird right I mean can you even be the president of two groups simultaneously in Japanese schools I didn't know that was a thing but regardless) and Yasumasa is the vice president. When one of the members gets too rowdy Yasu threatens to suck him off and I'm going to have to stop this whole review for a second because that one line is my favorite in the whole novel. Full context, I am a bisexual man. I lean about 60/40 in favor of women and didn't discover this part of my sexuality until I was in college, so the majority of my taste is centered around more traditional media rather then BL or Yaoi, but I do dabble in that as well. Yasu as a bisexual character is something I almost never get to see because in the words of my real life little brother "Japan only has two sexualities it recognizes, straight and fetish." Even setting that aside though for all the LGBTQ+ representation in American and Japanese media the B part of that is actually really hard to find good examples of in media ESPECIALLY male versions. They exist, but in recent years especially what little their is often gets drowned beneath a sea of purely homosexual characters and stories so its harder and harder to find. I can't tell you how excited I was to have this opportunity presented to me to see a good bisexual character because this game has a real chance to positively portray him and might even give the barest note of something between him and Hajime. I wasn't expecting a full romance route or anything, but their has to be a failure route in this game, and THAT is the perfect place to put something. It doesn't have to be flashy, maybe just a confession scene where Hajime, who rejected every one of these five girls, is approached by Yasu who questions him about why he's still single. It could end with a kind rejection, CG optional, or maybe even a kiss after the fade to black if they want to spoil me but this is a golden egg I'm BEGGING you Japan don't waste this... After the meeting Hajime returns to his room and the narrative shifts to view the three love interests he boards with in the bath. Now I'm by no means a pearl clutching reactionary, but their is literally no reason for this scene to take place in the bath outside of Echii. If you didn't install the H-patch the scene is bland and has absolutely no character sprites. If you did the camera hugs the largest tits in the room as the girls talk. This conversation could easily have been anywhere else in the building but whatever the first CG in this game was an up-skirt pantsu shot so I guess this isn't as egregious as THAT. This does give me a good opportunity though to mention I WILL be including the H-patch content in this review but I'll be sectioning it off as much as possible to it's own subsection. When I eventually get to the romance routes I'll be glazing over everything Echii but this particular scene was kind of unavoidable to mention because Kasumi announces that she is going to confess to Hajime in front of the other two girls... and then immediately gets out of the tub and does it! I don't know why I find that so surprising but we as readers met this character literally twenty minutes ago in and out of game so this is REALLY forward but I guess points for confidence. Kasumi's confession takes place in P-kun's room and is... a mixed bag. On the one hand her story, that she was a sickly girl P-kun would visited frequently ten years ago to bring homework and spend time with before she moved away for her health thus causing her to motivate herself to get better so she can one day reunite with her white knight is touching and romantic but also feels kind of rushed for a reason I can't quite explain. Maybe its the way she tells the story but I get the sense it would have been more impactful if it had a few more sentences of build up somewhere but for what it is it's serviceable. Hajime, understandably, politely tells Kasumi the two of them just met kind of and while he's flattered she feels so strongly about him he can't return her feelings as of yet because he knows so little about her. So not fully rejecting her but not saying yes either, just a request to get to know her first. Then she trips on him and the camera zooms on her boobs. So that ruins the mood as Yoshino comes in to tell P-kun he's terrible. A DAY OF CONFESSIONS The second half of the prologue begins with Kasumi transferring into P-kun's class, because of course she is. the next five minutes are background nobodies saying she's pretty. After a time skip to lunch these murmurs of Kasumi's apparent good looks reach all the way to the third year classes apparently because Ayaka bursts into the class to see her new competition appalled that Kasumi has been here less then 14 hours and has already confessed to her "crush." After establishing that Ayaka and Kasumi are now maybe possibly rivals not only for P-kun's affections but the beauty contest crown as well Yui, who apparently ran all the way from the sister school, bursts into the room, catches her breath, and asks Ayaka point blank if she is also here to confess to P-kun. If all of this is sounding rushed don't worry it is. Yui makes the kind gesture of apologizing in advance to Kasumi, who without question got to P-kun first, but nonetheless confesses her love in front of the whole class which WAY too embarrassing even for me and I can't help but think this poor girl is going to be RELENTLESSLY teased for this but whatever its cute she's so brave. Hajime gives her the same response he gave Kasumi, stating he wants to consider both of them before deciding, which is pretty cool of him not ganna lie. Kasumi takes it really well considering she's standing right there as it all happens and says she likes the idea the boy she loves is so popular so as many girls can confess to him as possible without bothering her. Everyone acts real mature about the whole situation and honestly the atmosphere of the whole thing is pretty sweet. Then Ayaka interrupts the mood tripping over herself to ask P-kun out too. Yeah, this is the worst confession in the game and her reasoning that "We should date because we're popular" is ridiculous. I don't have any jokes about this I just find it really poorly executed, 0 points. After that P-kun is chased out of the classroom and down the hall by a ravenous group of girls in a brief break for levity before the novel establishes P-kun is apparently remembering arm day because he hoists himself into the student council room through the window, and will do so on a regular bases throughout the rest of the novel. Inside he's greeted by Shiori, Yoshino, Yui, and Kasumi as well as the entire student council important enough to have a sprite. Yoshino, unable to take the second hand embarrassment of the girls who already confessed to P-kun cooks up a ridiculous plan. She confesses her "love" for him, saying she wants to have the most debauched relationship possible to get the romance ban reinstated and end all this chaos. The only important part of this is that no one thinks she doesn't actually like him and just felt jealous so she did something rash. Aoba asks if her brother is going to die tomorrow to keep karmic balance and at this point I wouldn't be surprised if he did. Anyway somehow this group chooses to be productive after all that and discussion begins on a PR campaign that the photography club, of which Shiori is a part, will be helping with. Hajime is nominated to be one of the models for a series of posters showing a model couple for students to look up to and the remaining girls fight over who will be his partner in the pictures. Everyone has their own reasons for why they should be picked but just when the reader may think they'll be given the first choice of the game Hajime (After a day of deliberation, a visit to the cafe Ayaka's parents own in which she works so SHE can be in on this, a much better and cuter scene then her introduction with Shiori at the dorm, and an admittedly pretty good fake out when Hajime gives a speech to the student body about the right to love in which we get a LOT of time with Yoshino.) just chooses Kasumi and the whole thing resolves... and then Shiori confesses her feelings in front of the other girls in the weirdest, most unsettling way possible. In a CG where she twists her head to look over her shoulder as it tilts back, Shiori, backed by the most ominous track possible, expresses she has loved P-kun since childhood blah blah that parts not interesting she looks like a total Yandere. Like no joke if this was the only picture you had to go on, which at this point it is, you'd expect this game to devolve into Love Letter at some point down the line it is TERRIFYING! Gotta admit though her stance of "If all it takes to get a yes from you is to get to know each other then I should easily win because I've known you for years." is a pretty good argument. Seriously though I really can't stress this enough she isn't just setting off a red flag it's BLOOD red. OKAY MAYBE THIS IS A LITTLE TOO POPULAR. The first of five subsections in the common route opens with P-kun being chased by a hoard of women and a 90's style record scratch sonic movie opening "Yeah, thats me, if you wanna know how I got here we have to go back to-" in medias res. Now because of the way the heart system works my summery from this point on is going to SOUND really surface level and bare but for every scene I gloss over with a sentence it is entirely possible something takes place that may not be important to the STORY but was purely designed to endear the reader to the heroine featured in it. I'll point out any moments I feel are noteworthy but just because not much PLOT happens doesn't mean NOTHING happens alright? P-kun has a flashback to this morning when Yoshino walked him to school and the two of them were mobbed by a hoard of girls who either want to ask him out or ask him about the girls who asked him out. He runs and abandons Yoshino to the wolves. Good boy Yasu meets up with Hajime for the cross view section which I will cover quickly. Yui's scene is just talking with Moka and getting pumped to go spend time with P-kun. Yoshino deals with the aftermath of being abandoned. Kasumi meets a cat girl and acts cute. Ayaka is swarmed by fans who agree to help her track down Hajime and Shiori has a panic attack. You see what I mean about these summaries? Each of those scenes was probably a ten minute read where not much happens but you're able to spend time with the heroines. I'd love to go line by line and talk about how charming some of these moments are but this review is already a monster so I'm just going to have to move on. Yasu is being blackmailed into helping the mob of girls but he nobly sacrifices himself for p-kun to escape, fainting to distract them. Hajime ends up at his favorite spot on campus, the Clock Tower, where Ayaka visits him and they have a chat. Apparently Ayaka's fan club is working like a not so secret service to give her an advantage. Which I kind of want to say is cheating but will let slide because the other girls get outside help from their friends later in the novel. Anyway the mob finds them and Hajime flees again, this time to the auditorium where Kasumi gives him a lunch since he probably hadn't had a chance to eat yet and if you don't give her a heart for that you're a monster this is a legitimately sweet gesture. Hajime freaks out that she was keeping the milk she got him between her breasts, must be a Japanese thing because I don't know a single teenage boy who would care. Anyway you can guess what happens, they're found, he flees, this time he's pulled into an unused room by Shiori who sits on his lap, which is somehow NOT a CG but whatever I'm not salty. The title screen has her in a close position to what I imagined anyway. Anyway more girls and more fleeing. (How long has this been going on don't you kids have class to get to?) Now Hajime climbs trough the student council room window again and finds Yui who stuffs him under her desk to prevent him from being spotted and we get ANOTHER pantsu shot which is WAY over quota now and its not even tasteful. Like this is full on up the skirt vag view, for which Hajime is rightfully punished by... being crushed between Yui's thighs... are we sure this is before the Echii patch add ons? The school day comes to an end when literally every heroine, Aoba, and Moka all end up at Ayaka's cafe (she had invited Hajime their in the earlier scene) and they talk for a bit about who Hajime is going to take on a date. For the first extra scene the reader gets to make that choice. Kasumi takes him to the mall where she clings to his arm, not a great scene but playful I guess. Yoshino runs into her political supporters against relationships and forces Hajime to pretend they are just out together as friends. Ayaka has a truly forgettable scene of walking with Hajime. But the two stand outs are definitely Shiori and Yui. Shiori has a scene I'm guessing is much more sexual in Japan where you measure her cup size, I don't know maybe that's your thing I just can't get over the *squish* sound effect it's like a bad anime skit. Yui calls you Onii-chan for the ONLY time in the novel and asks you to pet her head which is ADORABLE and it is a CRIME this is the only time this happens. Next day, new batch of hearts. Hajime runs out of ink for his pen... Theirs a joke here somewhere but I can't quite find it... anyway Yoshino offers him some of hers... god I really feel like I'm missing an innuendo here. Hajime turns her down and runs off to the campus store where he runs into cat girl and Ayaka. Apparently the store needs to sell a whole bunch of noodles nobody wants and cat girl is depressed about it. Ayaka offers to do a handshake event, which I guess is a Japanese thing where when you buy a certain amount of a product you get to touch a celebrity, and volunteers Hajime to be there too, so that's the plot of this subsection. All the girls find out about it and have their own reactions. The cross view section lays out their plans. Shiori skips class to be first in line. Ayaka uses her fame to advertise. Kasumi volunteers to work the store in exchange for four times the necessary amount of noodles to qualify for a handshake. Yoshino beats herself up over wanting to go to the event and not having a good excuse (She's really starting to lean into that aggressively shy personality about romance.) And Yui has a HEARTBREAKING scene where she thinks about how even the short distance between the two sister schools is a roadblock to her romantic prospects because unlike all the other girls she has to run every day to even SEE Hajime and they just have to go to class. She finds out about the handshake event but by then she knows she'll be way back in the line. Oh and Aoba has a scene where she tries to price gouge people and fails miserably, so that exists. Anyway the actual event takes place and all the Heroines get a chance to interact with Hajime, the scene comes off as a bit comedic with Yui wearing a disguise so the artist can make use of the alternate lab coat outfit she has for no good reason. Yoshino's indecisiveness makes it so she gets in line too late to buy any noodles but Kasumi gives her half of the ones set aside for her day of work. Ayaka cracks some pretty good jokes, and the whole thing ends with a photo shoot for the whole group where Ayaka surprise kisses Hajime on the cheek. And Shiori is there too. Then you get the least interesting extra scenes in the game. I mean they aren't BAD they're just comparatively the worst of the bunch. Ayaka tells you she was embarrassed to kiss you but swears she wants to make your heart flutter. Yoshino acts embarrassed on the walk back from school and runs off. Hajime just kind of chats with Shiori, walks Yui home, and gives Kasumi her "handshake" after she teases you. Nothing terrible just nothing super interesting either. FAVORITISM The next scene is a fireworks festival and the best part of the whole game. I mean it if you could somehow only play one part of this novel THIS is the part you should do it is cute, fun, has great jokes, honestly its better then any of the romance routes so if this review has gotten you interested in the game I honestly recommend a blind look at it you'll have a blast. The girls get into an argument about who is going to be Hajime's date to the festival and decide to play a game called King to determine the winner and while I would have LIKED to have this scene take multiple paths it always plays out the same way but the jokes here are top notch as the girls all try to one up each other. Theirs a CG of playing the Pocky game with Yoshino and it's adorable, honestly Yoshino kind of steals the show during the game till she passes out peso pon. Eventually the girls all drop out one by one until Kasumi wins and gets the right to your fireworks date. But tragedy! That night she calls Hajime saying she lost a special pendent and just can't leave the house without it. So he tells her to stay put since it's getting dark and goes to the school to look for it. The cross view this time around has the first of two tied for worst scenes in the game and some really cute moments. Kasumi ruminates on how cool you are for understanding she can't go on the date with you and decides to go to the school to look there even though you told her not to, but she's the outlier because literally all the rest of the heroines plan a big party at Hajime's dorm on Aoba's suggestion. In Yui's scene we see her upset that she lost the game with the other girls and Aoba suggests the party to cheer her up, why the developer decided this scene needed to be done from both Yui's AND Aoba's perspective when Yui would have been fine on her own I don't know but I HATE when visual novels repeat themselves like that it's maddening. The difference is literally six lines of dialogue but to find it I have to sift through all this stuff I JUST read, it's a waist of time. If you want me to have both perspectives, wright the scene in two parts and put one after the other, like Aoba recommends the party and then Yui thinks about what a great friend she is shortly after ANYTHING ELSE but this. Shiori, Ayaka, and Yoshino all get invited and agree to go. Their's also a really nice scene of some random no name guys talking about Hajime and how jealous they are of him but it's not mean spirited or anything they act really casual about it, honestly this might be my personal favorite of the cross fades its just got a really nice atmosphere to it. Hajime arrives at the school and tells off my boy Yasu for bringing a camera to school to catch couples getting frisky on campus during the fireworks which totally sounds like its going to happen given the recently lifted ban on romance making people lose themselves in the moment but Hajime is a total cock block and tells him to go home. After a long time searching Hajime bumps into Kasumi and just when they're about to lose hope and go home the fireworks start and a glint of light leads Kasumi right to her pendent on the ground. Overjoyed, but sad they missed their chance at a date, they head back to the dorm to find the party in full swing and have a great time. the extra scenes are all post festivities and range from decent to too cute to exist. Yui and Ayaka get walked home, nothing super interesting but sweet. Shiori helps clean things up and you do the dishes together like a married couple. But Kasumi and Yoshino definitely win this round. Yoshino, like a boo from Mario, inches closer to Hajime when he looks away but losses her nerve when he looks at her. Intentionally turning to see what she's trying to do but without looking directly at her he sees her creep up and lock pinkies with him with a triumphant "Yay! I did it!" under her breath. He responds by holding her hand and the two of them clean the outside party area together. Kasumi looks up at the starts and talks to herself about how fortunet she is to have met Hajime and when he approaches her she asks if, just for a moment, he'll let her think of him as her hero as she cries on his chest in relief she still has her pendent. It's not a long scene, but it is incredibly touching. the next subsection is a party at the dorm, no not the party we just had a different one, this time a sleepover. Theirs a scene with Hajime's teacher who I have purposely avoided speaking about until this point. Rest assured she has been here the entire time I just don't think she's very important. This is the exception however as Hajime runs off to save her from drunk driving and we get the cross view early. Ayaka stresses over what to wear with Moka, a scene we also get from Moka's perspective, same problem as last time don't worry I won't repeat myself. Yui rolls around in Hajime's bed, which I don't THINK is an innuendo in this case but who knows? Kasumi tries to bribe Aoba into giving up information on her brother and gets conned. Yoshino agonizes some more about being in love and Shiori hits her brother while thinking about getting treated like a 50's wife. Hajime brings the teacher back to the party and she kisses his cheek before being murdered off screen by five jealous women. After ANOTHER scene in the bath involving talk about all kinds of girl stuff it would be inappropriate for me to reveal here due to its private nature Hajime goes to take a bath of his own and all the girls show up in their swimsuits because OF COURSE we need a swimsuit scene this is a VISUAL NOVEL come on! Their is a lot of unnecessary boobs and then extra scene time. Ayaka is outside and reiterates to Hajime her desire to make his heart flutter. Yui sits on the couch with him and lets him pet her. Yoshino also gets head pats. Shiori comes to visit and nearly kisses p-kun and Kasumi burns her sensitive tongue after an indirect kiss. It's all really cute, good note to end the extra scenes on. The last section of the common route is the Haloween party and this is the point the narrative has been building toward. Tonight, Hajime chooses one of the girls to ask to the dance and finally gets a girlfriend and it is the least interesting part of the whole novel. It's not TOTALLY worthless, Yui and Kasumi get to be pretty cute but 90% of this section is just the heroines agonizing over who he's going to choose. Theirs a subplot about Yui being too busy to go to the party but its resolved quickly and the whole cast ends up together for a little free time and competition that Kasumi and Yui totally win. Something to note in the cross views is my good boy Yasu reveals he's into traps and shows the entire student council, all one of him, a picture on his phone of one. The scene ends with the first and only choice of the game. Who won your heart? THE LONG ROAD TO ROMANCE In the previous part I alluded to the fact I would be discussing the entire rest of the game in part 2 but as you could guess from the fact their is a paragraph left in this post I'm going to have to renege on that. I have no intention of stopping here but I'm going to need to make this a three parter at least, I just bit off more then I can chew. Next week, I'll focus on what happens with each heroine when she gets the chance to interact with P-kun by herself. If you're liking this review so far be sure to let me know as I'm putting a LOT more work into this one and feedback is the only way I can know if it's paying off. If you've read the novel let me know what you think of my summery, naturally I had to leave a lot out but I'm curious to see if you would have included something I overlooked or vise versa. Regardless, I hope you were entertained, stay well!
2020.09.19 15:44 Unwritten89Body positivity : Comments after sleeping with someone for the first time
So I (30F) recently slept with someone for the first time(30M). Our dates were going ok, he seemed into me and the sex itself was alright. After the act, he asked me whether I had acne as a teenager as I still have some obvious scarring/pits on my face and I said yes. He asked me whether I used to pick on my skin. I had taken accutane to control my acne but it was having a bad effect on my liver and my doctor had asked me to stop the dose after 1.5 months. I told the guy about this and added “I decided my liver was more important than some scars on my face”. He then proceeded to ask me about the stretch marks I have. When I hit puberty, my skinny ass and hips grew and I have stretch marks from it, and as I have medium brown skin, it is quite obvious like tiger stripes. He said “ah so you had a growth spurt and became a bear”. He then commented on how he like women to be completely hair free down there and asked me how I managed to keep things smooth, I told him I had shaved that evening, just before meeting him. He said “that’s nicely done” and that he didn’t know you could get that effect from shaving and thought I go for regular waxing. I told him I prefer to wax, but with Covid, it was hard to book a salon appointment in a jiffy and had to shave as I knew we would probably end up having sex that night. He commented how he likes my skin, and how my hands were hair free. Told him again, that I shaved that evening. I have never had someone ask such questions right after having sex and it made me a bit uncomfortable to be honest. I would have preferred these questions to come up I don’t know, some other time. Have you had such experiences? How to answer these type of questions without feeling slightly attacked? I never thought about it, but as these questions did make me feel a bit judged, how can I work on my body positivity? TL;DR - Slept with a guy for the first time and it was followed by comments/ questions on my skin/face etc..Felt a bit attacked, realized I need to work on my body positivity. Any tips would be appreciated.
2020.09.18 08:22 SmallStepsBigDreamsAutism Related Articles
Autism Related Articles Applied Behavior Analysis Programs Guide - Top Autism Blogs-01 Click here for a high-resolution badge. By ABAPG Staff July 2019 The world of autism, including autism research and autism education, are ever-evolving, making the blog the perfect forum to keep up with all that’s new and effective. While there are hundreds of excellent autism-related blogs on the internet, we’re sure we’ve found 30 of the very best. Each blog on our list was chosen based on a list of factors including the reputation(s) of the person(s) or organization(s) managing the blog, consistency, and quality of posts, and the blog’s website metrics. The latter includes the number of monthly hits, the numbers of Facebook and Twitter followers, and the number of websites that link to that blog. So whether you prefer to subscribe, bookmark, or just immerse, we’ve got your list of the 30 best autism blogs for 2019. Age of Autism With an average 11 new posts per week, the Age of Autism is a great blog to bookmark and refer to often. The blog keeps its readers up-to-date on autism news. It analyzes the environmental causes of autism and current treatment options from the perspective that autism is, in fact, treatable. Recent blog posts include, “A Modest Proposal for the Public Official Vaccine Compliance Act” and “The Neurodiversity Movement Should Acknowledge Autism as a Medical Disability.” The Art of Autism The Art of Autism is an inspiring blog written which seeks to inspire people with autism through the arts. About three new posts are added weekly. Each is written from the unique perspective of a physician, therapist, or parent. The blog entries are always topical and informative. They also include lots of information about new art exhibits, neurodiversity panels, and entertainment events. Autism Adventures Former special education teacher Melissa Finch runs the popular blog “Autism Adventures.” The blog is a valuable resource for parents and teachers of children on the autism spectrum. Blog posts range from everyday tips (“motivating kids with zero motivation”) to curriculum ideas to use in the classroom and at home. The Autism Dad With nearly 11,000 Facebook fans and 15,000 Twitter followers, The Autism Dad is the internet’s most popular autism-related blog that isn’t affiliated with a large organization. The blog is managed by a father of three autistic children who has made it his mission to “educate and help families like mine realize they aren’t alone.” On average, more than 30 new posts are added to the blog each week, on topics ranging from updates on his family to autism management tips and ideas. Autism Daddy The father of a teenage son with non-verbal autism is the manager of Autism Daddy, a blog followed by more than 150,000 people on social media. Not to be confused with The Autism Dad blog, Autism Daddy keeps its readers up-to-date on all that transpires in the author’s life: “the good & the bad, the pee & the poop.” New posts are published about once a month and are written on topics ranging from speech-language pathology to marriage, to tips for new autism parents. Autism Eye Autism Eye is the official blog of the quarterly magazine of the same name. Both the blog and magazine are written by award-winning journalists who also happen to be the parents of an autistic child. About two new articles hit the blog each week, and recent topics have included new drugs that boost brain connections, the need for better sex education, and respite centers. The Autism Helper While most autism-themed blogs are written by those with autism, or by parents of those with autism, The Autism Helper is written by Sasha Long, a behavior analyst, and special education teacher. This unique perspective makes it an invaluable resource, and the blog posts often include things like: educational tools and worksheets answers to parents’ commonly asked questions tips for working around different behavioral issues. Autism Parenting Magazine Archives Most parents of children on the Autism Spectrum are familiar with Autism Parenting Magazine. This magazine has a blog on which it posts its archived, previously published articles. Everything posted focuses on issues affecting those with autism, and topics are varied. Autism Resources and Community This autism-focused blog at Stages Learning posts about once per week and has tons of great information for persons interested in the subject. Posts are often written by therapists and educators, and common topics include: resources lesson plans general support updates information on various treatment options The Autism Site Blog The Autism Site Blog has become an invaluable resource for thousands of families coping with the challenges of autism. In fact, to form a community and provide assistance is exactly how this blog got started. Today, new posts appear daily and the blog enjoys more than 200,000 Facebook followers. Autism Society Blog The Autism Society Blog is the country’s foremost grassroots autism organization, so you can be sure its official blog is chock-full of inspiring stories and useful information. Indeed, each of the twice-monthly blog posts is meant to increase the public awareness of common issues faced by those on the autism spectrum. Therefore, common post topics include, among other subjects: the advocation of new services latest treatment information summaries of new research. Autism Speaks Blog Autism Speaks is perhaps the most recognizable autism organization in the world, so its official blog was an easy addition to our list of the best autism blogs 2018. The blog is the perfect resource in which to immerse yourself, as topics covered include, among other things: tips for practicing social skills answers to commonly asked questions analysis of the latest research. Autism With a Side of Fries For an honest look at a mother’s experiences with her autistic son, there may be no better blog than Autism With a Side of Fries. Eileen, the blog’s author, uses humor and passion to tell stories of her daily challenges and triumphs. She reminds her readers that when it comes to autism, “It’s better to laugh than to cry.” Autistic Mama Autistic Mama is a blog and valuable resource for parents, teachers, and other caregivers of children on the autism spectrum. Posts cover a variety of topics, including, among other things: diagnosis what it’s like to be autistic advocacy Recent blog posts include: “What Exactly is Stimming and Why do Autistics Stim?” “Outsourcing Math with Teaching Textbooks 3.0” “Neurodiversity Doesn’t Exclude Your Autistic Child But You Might.” Best Practice Autism Best Practice Autism is the informative blog of Dr. Lee A. Wilkinson, physician, and author of A Best Practice Guide to Assessment and Intervention for Autism and Asperger Syndrome in Schools. Though more clinical than most other blogs on our list, Best Practice Autism is chock-full of valuable tips and information about autism assessment and education. Dr. Wilkinson posts about three posts per month. Recent topics have included: “Alternative Therapies for Autism: Are They Effective” “Affective and Cognitive Empathy in Autism.” Faith, Hope, and Love…With Autism This inspiring blog started out being written by the parent of Philip, an autistic child who remained nonverbal for the vast majority of his life. More recently, Philip has begun writing his own heartfelt posts. The blog follows Philip’s journey from silence, to communicating via letter board, to his current state of communication. The blog’s authors also write about staying faithful to God during the most difficult challenges. Finding Cooper’s Voice Kate is a mother of three boys, one of whom has severe, non-verbal autism. This tough mama began her blog, Finding Cooper’s Voice, as a way to document her feelings. But over the years, the blog has turned into a supportive community of parents and caregivers from all over the world. Kate’s posts provide an honest glimpse into the daily life of raising a child on the autism spectrum. Happiness Is…: Navigating the World of Early Childhood Autism with One Special Little Boy Happiness Is… is the delightful and informative blog of a mother of a young child on the autism spectrum. New posts appear monthly on topics such as raising a child with autism, the latest autism industry news, and reviews of autism-themed books, apps, and other resources. Four Plus an Angel For parents of children with autism, sometimes it’s nice to hear from other parents. That’s the goal of Jessica’s blog, Four Plus an Angel. Through inspiring blog posts, Jessica shares daily experiences about her family and reveals the ways in which autism no longer defines either her daughter or their family. Go, Team Kate Go Team Kate is a social media favorite and one of the best autism blogs on the internet. More than 15,000 people tune in for weekly posts following a little girl named Kate’s autism diagnosis and her family’s challenges and victories. I Love ABA Those interested in Applied Behavior Analysis should be sure to check out I Love ABA. This popular blog is chock full of: free resources lesson plans an ABA glossary autism “red flags” everyday tips Tameika, the blog’s founder and main contributor, strives to keep this valuable resource “non-intimidating and simple to grasp” for anyone who is interested. The Journey Through Autism The Journey Through Autism is the personal blog of Ethan, a teenager who was diagnosed at age two with high-functioning autism. Ethan documents the ways in which he is continuing to reach his goals, despite his ASD. He also posts inspiring and thought-provoking ideas for the ways in which educators, doctors, and other caregivers can improve their interaction with those with autism. A number of experts also contribute regularly to The Journey Through Autism. Just a Lil Blog Just a Lil Blog is a must-read for those readers who are looking for a humorous perspective on what is often a very serious subject. In fact, Just a Lil Blog can be downright hilarious. Written by Jim Walter, a single father of two daughters, one of whom is autistic, Just a Lil Blog documents Jim’s unique and challenging experiences with honesty, humor, and lots of love. Look Me in the Eye Look Me in the Eye is a unique blog for a number of reasons. First, while most blogs deal with the autism experiences of young children and their parents, this blog is written by John Elder Robison, an author in his 60s who has Asperger’s Syndrome. Most autism-themed blogs either recount challenging experiences or present educational material. Robison’s blog doubles as a literary serial of his life with Asperger’s and an educational blog with his thoughts on the evolution of the autism spectrum over the decades. The Mom Kind The Mom Kind is a website chock full of resources for parenting neurodiverse children. The site’s creator, Alicia, is an autism and parenting coach and uses the website’s blog to share her parenting expertise. Two of Alicia’s children are on the spectrum, and therefore there is a special emphasis on families with multiple children with ASD. Raising Autistic Kids Founded by Kate M., a San Diego-based mother of an autistic son, Raising Autistic Kids is “a community of moms and experts.” Kate writes many of the blog posts, and says that even though she’s been a parent for many years now, she is still a rookie “because, with ASD children, the milestones don’t apply.” Other blog posts are written by volunteer guest bloggers who tend to be other parents or experts in the field of Autism Spectrum Disorder. Seattle Children’s Autism Blog The Seattle Children’s Autism Center is one of the foremost of its kind in the country, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that its official blog is one of the best of its kind. The blog features all kinds of helpful information for parents of children with autism, including encouraging stories, how-to’s, tips for keeping one’s patience and sanity, and even a blogcast. Stimeyland There are dozens of excellent blogs written by parents of children with autism. There are far fewer blogs written by autistic parents of autistic children. But Stimeyland is one of those rare blogs. Stimey’s experiences as an autistic parent herself provide readers with a unique perspective on common challenges, major triumphs in life, and recently, her daughter’s coming out as transgender. Squidalicious Squidalicious is the popular autism blog of Shannon Rosa, a self-proclaimed geek, and mother of the teenage Leo, who has autism. Shannon’s blog is often humorous in tone, even as she writes about the challenges she and Leo face, new information (and misinformation) in the world of autism, and even politics. Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism For those who wish to immerse themselves in an informative blog with evidence-based articles on autism, look no further than Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism. The blog posts approximately four in-depth articles per month, each of which is written by an autism parent or autism professional. https://smallstepsbd.ae/
“Iris. Iris? Earth to Iris West. Everything going okay?” The steady hum of the engine meandered through the car’s overwhelmingly beige cabin, a dull sight that still seemed lively compared to its surroundings and only passenger, Iris West. A dull, almost dosey look in her eyes, she sped along a lonely, all-too-straight road that ran along a grassy field in which she could see for miles. Needless to say, it was a far cry from the city driving she was used to, utterly devoid of the honking and shouting and cursing; she never thought she’d miss those things. But now that she saw the alternative, nothing, literally nothing but wide, open fields, she realized just how much she appreciated a little stimulation. And with that in mind, she’d decided to call Eddie Thawne, her boyfriend of a little over a year. “Yes, here. I’m sorry Eddie,” she said, “Just hard to stay focused, I’m so nervous.” She appreciated Eddie’s effort of delighting her with stories of his adventures with the CCPD, but after some time many of his anecdotes had begun to blur together. “You never did tell me what was so important you had to rush out of our anniversary dinner.” “That was Wind Master. God, that was a long night,” Eddie replied. “Windy too, I bet?” teased Iris. “You know, I’ve always wanted to be a cop. Almost put down roots in Gotham City,” Eddie continued as Iris chugged along the open country roads. “Imagine that, me trapped in a city full of crazies. At least they don’t have metas in Gotham.” Iris drummed her fingers against the steering wheel, abruptly, she changed the subject back to the reason behind her trip. “I wonder why they called. Why they invited me out here. Why now?” “Does it matter?” Eddie replied over the car’s stereo. “You haven’t spoken to the rest of the West clan in years. From the sounds of it, they’re finally done being jerks and… want to mend some bridges.”* “Fences,” Iris corrected him. “Huh?” “You mend fences,” she explained. “You burn bridges.” “Huh.” Iris was on her way to Blue Valley - a small town nestled in the middle of Nowhere, Nebraska - the home of the extended West family. Iris had, of course, extended the offer to the rest of the family, asking Barry, Cecile, and her dad Joe if they wanted to join her, but everyone had declined. Her brother Barry and stepmother Cecile were just busy with work, but her father... was more passionate about staying away. Joe had gone on a rant she’d heard a million times about all the various slights they had suffered and how they were terrible, unprincipled people. If she was being honest with herself, Iris wouldn’t have been to help but agree; Rudy, Mary - hell - even her aunt and uncle were rude and abrasive, even down right manipulative at times. And yet, Iris had accepted to meet with these terrible, awful people to try and cobble together some semblance of an understanding between them. Maybe that way everyone wouldn’t hate each other. “I know it must have taken a lot for them to reach out, but...” Iris began. “But I don’t know… I can’t help but feel a little… unsettled by it. It was just so sudden. I can’t help but think that--” “That they want something. Yeah, maybe. But you have to at least give them the chance.” Iris laughed. “Eddie, I’m like a few minutes away from their house. I’m giving them a chance.” “Just… be patient with them.” “I’ll try,” she replied. “I think I see their house now. I should go.” “Right.” “Eddie,” she called him. “I love you.” “I love you too,” answered Eddie warmly. “Stay safe.”
Cousin Rudy’s home was by no means special, blending in with the other farmhouses forty years out of date on the road with the expectation of one thing: it was a dump. Always had been. At the very least, everyone else tried to maintain their home, but not Rudy. The lawn was a mess of weeds, sticks and leaves scattered across it with such density that Iris would have mistaken it for a forest floor at a passing glance. The shutters’ paint found itself cracked, flecks of it tumbling to the ground with even the slightest gust of wind. Against the door of the one car garage, a litany of tools were leaned up, each one without even the slightest fleck of dirt on it; typical, Rudy was trying to make people think he was doing something productive, and a terribly unconvincing job of it, at that. Iris pulled into the driveway, her heart beating so intensely that she could feel it in the tips of her fingers. She pressed them into the wheel, hoping that that would alleviate the sensation somewhat. With a deep breath, she turned off the car, holding it in for a few seconds before she let out a long exhale. Yeah, she was nervous, but she had every right to be. With a small click, Iris opened the car door, feeling around in her pockets for her phone and key before she stepped out. A few steps later, she was at their front door, placing three tentative knocks against it and then waiting with baited breath. It was not long before the door flew open, so quickly in fact that Iris found herself jumping once it was flung open. Two people stood at the doorway: Rudy and Mary. They stood in sharp contrast to each other, Rudy being a pot bellied man, a bushy mustache snaked across his upper lip and scraggly hair slicked back to reveal a receding hairline, and Mary, who sported a thin frame with twisting, spindly fingers that made your skin crawl and bright ginger hair held in a style decades out of date. In unison, the couple smiled at Iris, an action that made her tense with a surprise she so rarely felt since she began viewing the world through the eyes of a reporter. “Iris,” Rudy boasted, throwing his arms wide, “Welcome! Welcome, please come right in.” He gestured for her to enter, Mary stepping aside. Hesitantly, Iris obliged, stepping into the house that found itself far dirtier than it should have been. Now, that was not to say it was a mess by any means, but as Iris walked by the couch, she noted how the pillows were slightly askew, the cushions wrinkled from being sat on, flecks of dusts on the coffee table. Mary was classically a clean freak. Iris couldn’t help but feel slightly happy for her, happy that she’d finally learned to relax a little. Rudy and Mary brought Iris into the dining room, an impressive spread laid out atop a white linen cloth that ranged from simple fair to complex dishes requiring hours of preparation catching the reporter’s attention before she even fully witnessed everything. Mary had never had the patience to cook anything this big before, and Rudy was famously terrible at it. Clearly a lot had changed in the time they hadn’t been speaking. Iris only hoped it was for the better. She took her seat at the table, settling into the thinly padded chair and trying her best to look normal. Rudy and Mary soon joined Iris at the table, sitting across from her and smiling a little too widely, seemingly trying far too hard to make a good impression. What was their game? “So, Iris,” Rudy began, “How is life in Central City?” Iris tensed a little. The rift in their family existed largely because of her father moving away to Central City against the wishes of everyone else, and, with the city being brought up so soon, it was like he didn’t even know how large of a sore spot it was. “The city is good. Great even. The Flash even has some new friends, speedsters. Negative Flash and Tracer and I think their names are. I don’t know if they’re his sidekicks or… Well, I don’t know.” “Three Flashes?” Mary smiled. “I’d think that’d be a bit excessive. Glad we don’t have to deal with that here. All that racing flooding the roads. It’s better that things are peaceful, quiet.” “Your daughter would disagree,” smiled Rudy. Iris perked up. “How does she like the Flash t-shirt I sent her?” “Practically threadbare,” replied Mary. “I’m glad.” The table became embroiled in small talk, the tension in Iris’ shoulders slowly dropping as time ebbed onwards. It was… surprisingly nice, to say the least, like they were completely different people or rather, the people they were when they weren’t hurling insults every which way and critiquing every decision made by every member of Iris’ family. God… just thinking about that made Iris mad. But then Rudy cracked a joke and everyone laughed, and it was like nothing had ever happened between them. A little ways into the conversation, Aunt Nadine and Uncle Ira - after whom Iris was named - walked into the room, greetings given by Rudy and Mary in response. But when Iris turned to do the same, something caught in her throat, her eyes going wide. There Uncle Ira, the God-knows-how-old man who’d been walking with a cane for as long as Iris could remember, standing freely, proud and tall. Hell, Iris could even swear there was even a spring in his step! “Uncle Ira!” she gasped, not able to contain her surprise, “Your cane? What happened to it?” “Iris, dear,” he smiled, “You’ll never believe it! The doctor’s damn pills actually worked!” “What pills?” “‘Bout a month ago, my doctor prescribed me these new little pills for my leg and by darn, they worked! Feel like a spring chicken ever since.” Aunt Nadine slapped Ira gently on the chest. “Well, maybe not exactly a spring chicken, but you get the idea. I’m much better than I was.” Iris smiled. “That’s really great to hear.” “And how’re you, dear?” Aunt Nadine asked, sitting down next to Iris and grabbing some food. “Oh, peachy.” “Peachy is always good. As long as the peach ain’t rotten.” She chuckled at her own joke. A steady laugh rippled through the table, ushering in a few moments of silence. Iris was the first to break it. “So, how are all of you?” “I’m fine. Trying to take better care of the yard,” said Rudy. “But then again, I’ve been saying that for the past how many years?” Mary laughed. “At least you make the effort.” “Maybe he’d make more of an effort if having a good lawn was tax deductible.” Uncle Ira chimed in, grinning widely. “It’s true!” Rudy lit up with laughter, “I would!” Aunt Nadine rolled her eyes. “Even with another deduction, taxes would still be too high.” Iris lifted an eyebrow. “They’re charging me through the nose for these damned pills as it is...” Uncle Ira grumbled. So, that’s what they wanted. That’s the reason why she was here: Money. Iris did her best to hide the contempt that swelled within her, but a mere fraction of it still managed to spill out in the form of her lip upturning. It was stereotypical, really, drawing her here on false pretenses to exploit her. But then again, this side of the family was always overwhelmingly unscrupulous. And to think that she was foolish--no--naive enough to fall for their ploy. Some reporter she was... But as the family continued to converse and laugh, Iris centered herself. She remembered what Eddie had told her: “Be patient with them.” If Iris was going to write them off, go home and admit to her father that he was right about his brother and the family, she’d be damn sure her suspicions were correct first.
Pink hues stretched themselves across the horizon, laiden above a sea of green that only grew darker as the sun set. It was really all quite beautiful if Iris were being honest with herself, so far from the constant rush of Central City she had spent much of life in. She could understand the appeal of the place, the urge to stroll along a sidewalk and admire the quaint houses from a time long past, to roam through the unkempt woods and see what nature had to offer… to live a slow and steady life away from it all. But Iris was not one of those people, she needed the hustle and bustle of the city to keep her interested, engaged in the world around her and not numbed to death from boredom. When she had arrived in Blue Valley, she wondered how long it would take to succumb to that… dullness, even with her ever troublesome family. To her luck, though, such a thing had not happened and she’d found something to keep her in it all. A mystery. If she was honest with herself - which she always tried to be - she wasn’t sure which conclusion she was seeking. Was it better to learn her extended family weren’t all manipulative freeloaders? Or did she crave the catharsis of yelling at them all, one-hundred-percent sure they were scum? Sure Rudy and Mary’s home was far too crowded for her to slink around and investigate, not unless she wanted to get caught going through their bank statements. Instead, Iris was taking a more indirect route, electing to pay a visit to some old family friends. Charles and Ariya Elkin were close family friends of the Wests, at least as far back as Iris lived there. The main reason being that Iris and their daughter Chanda were friends back in kindergarten. And while Chanda had long since moved away from the small rural town - while it had been well over ten years since Iris and Chanda had last spoken - Mr. and Mrs. Elkin still seemed pleased to see Iris’ face. Overjoyed in fact. Iris had spent the rest of the afternoon with the Elkins, catching up and - unbeknownst to them - interviewing them for all they knew on the Wests, inquiring into their financial status. Small questions like if they’d talked to the Wests recently and what they talked about if they did. Hell, she even complained about Blue Valley’s steep taxes herself, fibbing about the similar rates of Central City. Surprisingly, that turned out to be a good way to get the information she needed as she could easily slip in, “Oh, and how are my family doing on that front?” The Elkins didn’t know exactly - it wasn’t as if they’d been prying into their neighbor’s finances - but in a town as tight-knit and small as Blue Valley, they knew enough to satisfy Iris’ thirst for answers. The Wests were doing fine. Better than fine, actually. So that meant, for better or worse, that her family had been truthful about their intentions. And Iris loved that! Truly, she did, if for no other reason to prove her father wrong. But… “The suddenness of it all,” Iris muttered to herself, turning on her heel and beginning to walk back to her family’s home, “It’s just so off-putting.” But as she strolled along the sidewalk, allowing her mind to drift off into a sea of speculation for the future, out of the corner of her eye, she caught a wisp of yellow. At first, she paid it no mind, believing it to only be a trick of the eye, an old street lamp refracted strangely. As she kept going though, walking further along towards her destination, that light kept appearing, soon drawing ire from the woman. She whipped her head around, eyes scanning her surroundings for the source whatever it may be. Try as she may though, Iris could not find any-- A hand wrapped around her mouth, muffling her scream, and Iris soon felt whomever it was trying to pull her away. But the years of training from her police father kicked in without her thinking and she elbowed her assailant, bringing her hands to deliver a blow that knocked them clean on their ass. Iris’ heart beat a million miles a second just from that small flash in the pan of danger, one she could now see was no threat at all. A young girl, blonde and skinny lay on the sidewalk, rubbing her head. “What’s your problem!?” Iris exclaimed, thinking this was some prank the kid was playing on her, “I really could have hurt you!” The girl heaved herself up, the hurt look on her face replaced with one of panic as her eyes widened. “That’s great, really, but we gotta move fast. My name’s Frankie. I live here. And something is controlling everyone.” “Controlling everyone? What are you talking about?” Iris raised an eyebrow. “These people - the whole town - they aren’t themselves!” Frankie called out in a hushed tone. “And if you don’t come with me, they’ll figure out you aren’t one of them, and you won’t be yourself anymore either!” “What?” “Checking in with the neighbors, asking weird questions?” Frankie explained. “The drones don’t need to ask anything. They’re all linked.” Iris threw up her arms. “I’m sorry, no. This joke isn’t funny. How come you haven’t been taken over yet, huh?” Frankie looked around, lowering her voice. “I have powers. I can… control magnetic fields and that’s protected me somehow. I amplified your magnetic field when you arrived in town. If I hadn’t, they would have already got you.” “What? When?” Frankie grabbed Iris’s hand. “Please, we have to go somewhere safe. We’ve been exposed for too long.” A cacophonous sound of clattering doors echoed through the rapidly chilling air of Blue Valley, causing the pair to jump with fright. Frankie, in particular, was startled, seemingly knowing full well what was about to happen well before Iris did. In each doorway, the occupants of each home stood, their eyes glazed over and their postures rigid as could be. The teenager whipped her head about, searching for an escape route that she quickly found, knowing the town as well as she did, though it was far from ideal. Frankie tugged on her compatriots hand, a look of unadulterated fear on her face. “We need to run! Now!” Without even waiting for an affirmative, she began to sprint away with Iris in hand, literally pulling her along for a time before the reporter finally got the message. “What’s happening?” Iris questioned, a growing panic in her voice as she noticed the townspeople standing in their doorways. For a brief moment, Frankie looked back. “Zombie apocalypse movie, basically.” “Sounds fun,” groaned Iris, trying to sound as sarcastic as possible to cover up what had quickly grown into a deep terror. As Mary had pointed out: here in Blue Valley, there was no Flash to save them. No heroes to protect them. It didn’t take long for the raucous sound of a hundred footfalls to fill the ears of both Iris and Frankie, urging their hearts to beat ever faster as they sprinted towards some destination Frankie had picked out in her head. Iris would be lying if she thought that the idea of trusting some random teenager appealed to her, but she didn’t think that would be a particularly uncommon sentiment, but she didn’t exactly have much choice in the matter. For now, all she could do was run, run as fast her legs could carry her and hope that things would turn out all right. Hope was all she had, that and her years of experience in college track and field. The zombified townspeople proved to be simply too overwhelming for the duo to escape though, and they soon found themselves surrounded, being bored down upon by a faceless crowd. Positioned back to back, Iris and Frankie prepared to face down the crowd, for whatever that may have been worth. “You know,” Iris said, “This isn’t really how I pictured myself going out.” Frankie smirked. “You’re not gonna be killed . Just mind controlled.” “I suppose that’s...” Iris took a deep breath, “It could be worse.” “Could it?” One of the zombies lurched at Iris, being met by a stern punch across the jaw. “I’ll make a way for you to escape!” Frankie shouted, utilizing her magnetic powers to use a man with a metal hip as a proverbial bat against the zombies. “I can’t just leave you here!” “Yes, you can! I have super powers! I’ll be fine!” Frankie threw her arms out and all of the metallic objects in the immediate radius began to shake, the cars rumbling, the nearby chain link fence convulsing. Then, as they vibrated faster and faster, caught in Frankie’s electromagnetic field, a thunderous, deafening sonic boom blasted from Frankie’s form, rattling the entirety of the town and blowing out Iris’ hearing. But Iris didn’t need to hear to put one foot in front of the other and use the cover of the blast to get as far away from the zombified townsfolk as possible. While the majority of the mindless mob swarmed Frankie, whom Iris had reluctantly left behind, Iris sprinted away, with only a dozen of the townspeople in pursuit of her. As if being chased by only a dozen zombies was worth celebrating. Still, Iris seemed to be able to keep ahead of them, noting the gap between them as she sporadically glanced back. Their once rigid posture had changed, with many of them hobbling to follow her. She figured the sonic boom must have disoriented them, as she knew it had disoriented her. Iris’ only hope was making it back to her family’s house, hopping in her car and driving away, praying to God that these mind-controlled men and women didn’t know how to drive. However, as Iris turned the corner onto Rudy and Mary’s street, she realised they were one them ahead of her, with Rudy, Mary, Nadine and Ira - along with a handful of their neighbors - surrounding her vehicle. They planned this. Was this why they summoned her back to Blue Valley? Iris stopped and turned back, unable to proceed down the street without her family and their neighbors grabbing her. But as she glanced back the way she came, she instantly realised she was out of luck. Her pursuers had closed the gap, and she was surrounded. Now, Iris was truly left with one thing only: Hope. Seconds before the mob could lunge at her and assimilate her into their hivemind, a red-blue blur crashed down from the sky. With a thunderclap, the townsfolk were blasted back, smacking violently against the street. Before Iris stood a familiar but different figure, one that made it clear she was safe upon first sight. Superman. “Take my hand!” called out the younger, skinnier Man of Steel. And, without thinking, Iris did. In a single movement, Superman plucked Iris off of her feet and was up, up and away, soaring into the sky with the intrepid reporter in his arms. And as they rocketed through the sky, far, far away from Blue Valley, Nebraska, he said one thing to her, wrestling to cut through the windrush. “Easy, miss,” he grinned. “I’ve got you.”
The adventures of the world’s greatest superheroes begin in Justice Legion #1!
2020.09.16 00:12 MysticPigI [M] can’t tell whether my girlfriend wants to have sex or do anything sexual.
Keep in mind we are teenagers in highschool and she is a virgin and I am not. We’ve been dating for about 2 months now and the other day I kissed her for the first time which was her first kiss. Today I was making out with her and I couldn’t tell whether or not she wanted me to put my hands on her vagina (outside of her clothing). She’s fine with me touching her thighs, breasts, and butt, but I didn’t wan’t to ask her if it was ok for me to touch her ‘there’ because I honestly had no idea if she would know what I meant by that. I tried moving my hand up and she didn’t do anything about it so I eventually got to ‘there’ and again she didn’t do anything. When I was there I started rubbing (I’m not super experienced yet either, so tips on that are welcome too) she seemed completely fine with it. When we were done kissing I just put my arm around her, but when I went to do it again later when we were kissing she had her legs together already when I put my hands on her thigh. She’s very subtle with her hints and I can’t tell what she likes or dislikes and I really just don’t wanna mess this up because I really really like her. Would you say I try again and see what happens then or talk to her about it (we were really good friends before so that might be a bit awkward)? Also should I tell her to just say or do something (a signal) if I’m doing something she doesn’t like? Edit: I know no one will probably see this so this is more for me but I texted her about what she thought about sex. I told her I didn’t mean just putting the penis in the vagina because I know there are different kinds of sex that people have. I also told her that the message wasn’t supposed to be suggestive and that I was legitimately wondering (because I was) so she wouldn’t feel uncomfortable saying something that she thought I wouldn’t want to hear. She said she wants to keep what we have right now for a little longer so she can get used to it. I also made sure to ask her if I had done anything that she didn’t like so far in our relationship physically, and she said she doesn’t want me to touch, in her words, her no no square. I made it very clear from that point on that I didn’t want to do anything that might make her uncomfortable or unhappy because keeping her comfortable, safe, and happy is my number 1 priority. I’m not sad or disappointed that he doesn’t want to do anything right now because if she does want to do more in the future it will make her happy. I am also making a promise to myself at this moment that I won’t do anything suggestive anymore until she makes a move or tells me she wants to do something. I’m really glad that I got a few responses out of this post, you guys really helped out a lot :). There seemed to be a lot of opinions on what I do so I sort of followed all of them and now she’s really happy that we talked about it. I’m sure I’ll post here again for more questions (I hope there isn’t a limit on how many you can ask) but until then I’ll be more open to my girlfriend and ask what she wants instead of just guessing.
2020.09.14 19:01 Allen139Some advice on how to be a good server. *Satire*
Okay everyone. I've seen a lot threads asking for advice on how to be good server. Much like you newbies, I was young, optimistic, and happy. However, after 6 grueling years of hospitality, I have become old, angry and bitter. I started out in polished casual and worked my way to fine dining. Here's what I've learned:
Guests aren't your friends. You want their money, they want your service and that's it. The goal is to get the max tip with min effort. At first I was tempted to lie right to their entitled asshole face if need be. They Republicans? "MAGA BABY!" But after some experience, I realize people tip just fine with out the extra chit chat. Personally: Maybe if she's hot ill give them extra bread, but other then that, it's not worth it. Burn and turn. Research has shown that most people tip the same even if you go above and beyond.
Fuck all your coworkers, as is tradition. You are gonna be part of a group. A new culture. Might as well adapt to your new environment. Ensure your sexual performance is up to par though. One time my friend drunkenly hooked up with my coworker and came right away; we called him minute man for like a week. But whatever your do, just make sure you end up with your manager, so you get the good shifts and sections. Which brings me to next point.
Try to help out when you can. Manners are contagious and people notice that shit. Just make sure your section is squared away first. Run food if your bored. This gives you some FaceTime with the chef and cooks. If they like you, they'll give some good food for free, they will also be willing to do your stupid-ass mods for your personal food. You can also flirt with them to get what you want. But whatever you do, do not piss off the chef.
Chef are a special type of creature. They often work very long shifts for a paltry pay. They also usually expo which is a high stress job. So they're very temperamental by nature. So if they are an asshole to you, don't get your panties in a bunch. Take it in stride baby. Besides, they usually have a shit home life. He may be an asshole to you, but least your wife aint cheating on you because your never home.
Make sure you do your sidework. If your checking sidework, ACTUALLY CHECK IT. When i was new, some asshole named Steve lied to me about doing sidework. I trusted him. Turns out he didn't do shit and left early. Steve, I know you read this page and to you i say: your a pussy.
Did they forget to specify a side? Give em fries. I know I know, you should've asked. But you aint got time to go back and present options, wait for them to make a decision, only for them to settle on fries. Skip all that bullshit. They will get fries and they will like it. Fuck em. Same goes for cheese on a burger. Just give em chedder and move on with your life.
Most people can't tell the difference between a merlot and cab. And no one can tell the difference between the brands of the same type of wine. As long as its a chardonnay, they won't know. Order the wrong one? Give it to em anyway. The only thing that needs to match is the price. Split off the wrong one and re-ring the proper wine. Why? Because fuck them. They are nothing but another customer. Unless she's hot. In which case, give her a free sample. Maybe she'll give you her number. That how I met my last lover. Her name was Kim; sex was great but she was crazy.
Up-sell. Especially if its a date. Try to make it out like there is a better option and he's a cheap fuck for getting the cheapest option. This is especially true if its wine. The bigger the bill, the bigger tip. If they order too much food, don't warn them. Just order it. They can get a box after anyway.
No matter what went wrong, its your fault. Always remember that. But no worries, because if you fuck up, offer them a free drink or dessert, and they usually quit bitching. Tell your manager about it and start recovery asap.
Make sure you come in stoned or on coke. Nearly everyone else is, might as well adapt to your environment. Some of you might be thinking "no way, uncle Allen, I'll never come in under the influence of an illegal substance!" Oh sweet summer child, give it a few months and one too many Karen's, you will be begging your coworker to hit their pen. Might as well bring your own. Cleaning up all those little fucking cheerios of some nasty little spawn of Satan is shitty. Its not so bad if your stoned off your ass though.
Racism and tippers. Some believe a certain race are better tippers then others. This a stereotype. Its not true and its not cool. Let me bestow some wisdom on you young padawon: The worst tippers are in fact children and teenagers. You will come to hate those disgusting little shits. They don't have much money nor do they buy much. Make sure you give them poorest service possible. This serves 2 purposes: to not waste your time on shitty tippers, and it teaches those little fuckers that the world is a cruel place. Welcome to real world kid. Now gtfo my section.
That about wrap things up kids. Good luck on your first shift. Follow my advice and you'll be stealing tables in no time!
2020.09.14 15:13 DBTravenI am investigator of inexplicable "Liminal Spaces". These are the tales of Hell's Hallways
CASEFILE: 008A /SATANS STAIRWELL/ Downtown, in an unassuming stairwell, in an unassuming office block, there’s a corner full of unexplainable, impenetrable blackness. It’s just across from where the caretaker keeps the “Caution: Floor Wet” signs and it looks like someone sprayed ink on the wall. Deputy Office Manager Caroline O’Keefe had been staring at it for two days. They called me in some time around noon. They should have called along time ago. Once someone has gotten “stuck” on the environment it makes my whole job that much harder. No one else could see what Caroline sees, on her knees that are bleeding by now and pointing a flash light into the dark spot like it’s any kind of protection or revelation. The HR manager that greeted me had teeth so yellow they looked like soaked urinal cakes. He was sweating profusely and the sweat gathered in little pools at the back of hid neck fat as he walked ahead of me. He spoke hurriedly, like a man worried a bomb was about to go off underneath his feet. “You know, things move really really dynamically around here and it’s the back stairwell that no really uses so I guess we didn’t notice. And for a while we thought it might just be some stress or something. We figured she’d come to her senses you know. Anyone by the time we got to dialing the emergency services...well they walked right through the fire door to the stairwell and handed us your card”. I asked if Caroline was married. The Hr Manager turned around and raised an eyebrow in curiosity at the question but seemed to defer to my judgement amidst all the strangeness. Wise move. “Um...no not to the best of my knowledge. No next of kin or anything. She lives all alone in a little apartment. Kind of sad if you ask me”.He brought his voice down to the gossipy whisper for the last barb. I just nodded professionally. “Single people are more likely to get ‘stuck’ as we say. Folks with busy home environments get used to tuning out the details of their surroundings. Usually the worse they’ll get is a kind of sweeping sense of dread and unease. But the less you’ve got going on at home the more likely you’ll get stuck in a place like this”. The hinges sang in a shrill tone as the HR manager opened the door ahead of me. There was Caroline dull brown skirt and rear end poking out from behind the stairs. I gestured to the HR manager that he should leave the stairwell and instruct no one to come through while I was working. He agreed with a moments hesitation, taking a last look at the lady in her mid-40s frozen on her knees, head invisible, before scuttling back out into the safety of the bustling office. I placed my bag down on the floor, grabbed a roll of duct tape from it and then set to work. “The purposes of those spaces which can develop hostile liminality are almost always as gateways between one place and the next. These can be stairs, non-descript hallways between rooms, or even empty highways that pass between one small town and the next. These are spaces we pace through unconsciously ordinarily, fading into the background chatter of our everyday lives, invisible by their very non-descriptness. With no human attention of purpose to take in root in them, to bless their geometry and maintain their shape, other things can begin to dwell there. Sinister things. *-*Excerpt from ‘An Introduction to the Hazards of Liminal Environments’, 2002, 8th revised edition With a delicate bite I tore off one last thick strip of duct tape and layered the last of the tarp over the windows that looked out over the parking lot behind the building. There was only darkness now, fought valiantly against by the halogen hum of the lighting overhead. They key was to seal the stairwell off in a way, from other mental and visual noise. The stairwell that people passed through unthinkingly, lost in fantasies or daydreams, was now calling attention to itself and it was best to listen without any distractions. I dropped the duct tape back in my bag and walked over to where Caroline was prostrate, flecks of blood around the space where he tights were worn and frayed from kneeling. I kneeled down to, getting close to her red head of hair and breathing in the odor of sweat mixed with perfume. I passed my hand back and forth in front of her eyes, trying to illicit some kind of response, but got none . I settled into a lotus position and side-eyed the corner that had so captivated her entrance. It was nothing unusual to the ordinary eye;gritty skirting board that had never been cleaned, a patch of mould here or there on the inoffensive off-yellow of the wall, some change that looked old enough to have been subject to inflation while it lay forgotten. I spoke aloud to the darkness, a little bit of frustration tinging my voice. “Oh no don’t be shy. Don’t be a tease like that. I come all dressed up for our first date and you won’t even come out of the house...”. I pulled a pack of cigarettes from my coat pocket, plucked one from the pack and lit up. I had sealed up the smoke alarm like a mob guy wrapping a body so there was no concern about that. See these liminal spaces, they like rules. Do this, don’t do that. No flash photography, no smoking, no pets and on and on. But not the explicitly sign posted stuff that screams at you in a font so big you notice it every time you step in the room. They like the rules you internalise, place deep inside you and allow to smother over your nerve impulses like honey. They like the common sense stuff, the “Oh heavens no who would even think of smoking in an office stairwell” stuff. They love a quiet place that governs your body and your mind even as you think you’re in full control. The student groups in the sixties used to say “there’s a policeman in all our heads”. Well that policeman ain’t no border guard and his iron fist can be welcoming for some insidious, otherworldly things. Breaking the unconscious rules of their environments usually gets a reaction from spaces like these. I was halfway through my cigarette, and the curlicues of smoke were dancing on the air, when the carpet began to grow up like moss around my free hand. It grew the way flesh repairs itself in fast-forward, stitching hairy little sinews together until its puke green had crawled its way to my wrist in seconds. I put the cigarette out on it and it caught, embers smoldering and glowing, before it retreated back to the floor and smoothed itself into its perfect previous shape. I swore I heard a whisper. I turned back around to the corner that Caroline was obsessed with and it appeared to me for a moment, black and splotchy, eating away at the little corner unaffected by the lights fighting the good fight. I blinked and it was gone. “You’re a clever one” I said cockily, to the air. “Most of you can’t hide your diseased walls and shifting floorboards for quite so long. It’s like you’re so damn excited for all the attention like a teenage boy with his hand up a lady’s shirt for the first time. But you’re coy. Maybe my reputation precedes me. Perhaps we’ve met before in passing and this time you got all dolled up for me”. I speak my on-stage banter into the dim light like a priest reciting prayers. It doesn’t nothing to change the quiver in my legs as I head up the stairs to try the door to the call centre on the next floor. “Some theorise the phenomenon of liminal spaces can be directly correlated to the beginning of the Atomic age, others attribute growing reports to changes in building materials and architectural style in the late 20th century while still others contend they have been with us from the very beginning of recorded time; from the Aztec’s with their tales of walled-up ‘Snake-belly stairs’ to the Pictish and their ‘Huts of Harrowing’. Until such time as further anthropological study is founded we can merely address the issue in a here-and-now sense. Homeowners, governments are less interested than historical origins than in how we can stop certain corridors from become ‘psycho-spatially’ unstuck, so to speak. How we can stop the stretch of linoleum to a supply closet from provoking suicidal ideation or why people keep going missing in the hollowed out old shell of a former supermarket. In that interest Psychogeographers, and aspiring ones such as yourself, shall ply our trade with the primitive tools and knowledge at our disposal” *-*Excerpt from ‘An Introduction to the Hazards of Liminal Environments’, 2002, 8th revised edition I climbed that one flight of stairs about eight times just to be sure. Same odd mustard stain on the left banister. Same “CALLDIRECT4U Sales Floor” sign on the lonely door on the landing. The further I climbed the more perfectly the whole sequence repeated itself. We call that ‘Xeroxing’. In the offical literature and coursebooks its “progressive spatial replication” of course, but I guess the Xerox folks are litigious or whatever. Usually the space struggles to replicate itself a bit, and when you’re in the trade you notice so called ‘artifacts’, little flourishes of error here and there. One step a little higher than the others. A replication of a door without a handle. A fire extinguisher upside down. But this place was pitch perfect with each new ascension and it was disturbed me deeply. At last I made a beeline for the door to the 4th floor call centre. In a liminal space the end of the transition is usually where things really began to brake down. The space could only guess at its content through glimpses and, once you get enchanted in its bizarre ‘unstuckness’ you’re hypnotised enough that it knows it can through any old mess at you and keep you trapped. I grabbed the handle expecting to push my way through to find whole patches of floor swallowed in blackness, cubicle walls bisecting bodies and phone lines growing like antennae from people’s heads. The door wouldn’t budge. And the heat was tremendous. I backed off a little. Could it sense I wasn’t spellbound by its impossibilities? I had never met such a hostile space before. Normally you’re greeted with wide open arms, bent at impossible angles, but welcoming in an eerie way none the less. This place wasn’t just a virus corrupting the unregarded space around it, it was a disease with antibodies of its own, ready to isolate the cure in the name of protecting the illusions of its host. I ran down the stairs to grab my bag and of course found myself right back in that same call centre door corridor. I swore under my breath. This thing was really getting in my head. I had let my guard down to verify the Xeroxing and it seems I hadn’t quick gone all the way in putting my mental defences back up. I gritted my teeth and this time I counted my steps on the metal stairs as I decided, definitely focusing on each clang. 1...2…3...4...5...6...7...8...9… Then there I was, back in the little stairwell with Caroline. I grabbed a crowbar from my bag and went back up the stairs in the same measured and deliberate way. As I ascended I could suddenly hear Caroline softly crying beneath the drumming of the metal. Somewhere my own tear ducts and sinuses tickled with terror. This place was different some how. Still I resolved to figure out more fully what I was dealing with before I began the reorientation process. “While the process of reorientation is normally recommended as lasting days or even weeks, if a liminal space has become particularly hostile or dangerous to the unwilling occupant more brisk emergency measure can be applied. The subject’s sense of psycho-geographic self has become powerfully bound with this space and so tearing them away so quickly poses many psychological and physiological risks, some of which we may not yet even fully understand. In necessary situations some expedited solutions are presented below” *-*Excerpt from ‘An Introduction to the Hazards of Liminal Environments’, 2002, 8th revised edition The metal door handle to the call centre was beginning to thrum and glow with the heat. I could almost see it expanding and the bolts were heaving against the pressure. It was when I began to hear the screams behind the door that my arms moved on their own. I jammed the crowbar into the space in the doorway, praying that a peek inside might give me a better idea of the abilities of the space. Instead I almost collapsed. As I pryed a gap between the door and its frame a wave of heat came out to meet me like a hobo’s stagnant breath. I stumbled back slightly before getting a glimpse inside to hell itself. Pillars of fire took the place of support columns, emerging from a floor that had gone from carpet the shifting magma. The skin of those inside was pink as new flesh beneath a burn and they whispered screams through gurgling, dry vocal chords. But it was the woman who met my eyes. And I met her lack thereof, holes burned in the middle of her pink face, skin peeling from her chin like the first whiskers of puberty. Her knees met the magma and her hands held an object that looked made of bone pointed straight at me. A flashlight. The door snapped shut with the sound of a snake swallowed an egg whole. I bolted down the stairs and screamed my counting as I descended. I ran to my bag and grabbed a Ziploc bag I had hoped would not be a necessity. From it I produced three small bags and hauled them over to where Caroline was kneeling. I took her shoes and socks off without much resistance and flung them towards my bag. I took a deep breath I swore swirled with smoke that wasn’t mine. I leaned down to Caroline’s ear and I began to recite in my wavering attempt at a soothing voice. “You’re on the beach. It’s a clear and beautiful day. You stand at the water’s edge.. You dig your toes into the fine and even sand.” I grabbed some of the white sand from one of the clear bags and sprinkled it around her feet, making sure that some flowed between her toes. “The sun is warm on your back and hits a spot between your shoulders like a massage. Birds hang lazily on gusts of air above, wheeling and ducking, calling from a distance” I puffed up and blew into the bird call whistle I had produced from another bag. My throat was parching now as the heat was turning up. “The water laps gently at your feet as the ocean grows and recedes in its age old dance” I tipped over the bottle of 100% pure mountain spring water and suddenly Caroline shifted here eyes from side to side and dropped the flashlight. Her mouth began to open in a scream but I grabbed her so the sheer surprise seemed to take over from the terror in the moment. A second later we were both hurtling through the door and onto the floor of the insurance sales office. The sound of licking flames disappeared in a single swinging motion behind us. The whole office paused its chatter and swung eyes from computer monitors to us. The HR manager came jogging out of a glass-walled corner office to haul me to my feet, leaving Caroline where she was. “What do we owe you...and did anyone outside see you?!” I stooped down to steady Caroline to her feet. She was breathing heavily and her eyes were darting around her. I moved my gaze to the HR manager and asked him to find her some place to sit, preferably surrounded by personal affects to ground her. I told him he’d be receiving my invoice shortly and that for now the stairwell was officially “condemned” and would have to be off limits. He started going on about elevator capacity and I left him behind, strolling straight out into a dull Autumn afternoon. I swore, at the back of my neck, I could still feel the lick of flames as I walked. I took a brand new, circuitous route home, and looked carefully at every street sign and doorway on my way there. ---- The next case that rattled my bones was that ghastly guestroom
2020.09.14 00:26 love-ya4My (20f) boyfriends (24m) morals and reactions to inconveniences make me feel icky.
We have been dating 2 years and consistently work on our communication, boundaries, and a deeper connection. I have trauma and mental diversity and he is more or less neurotypical. I’ve been going through different therapies for about three now, and I feel really confident and comfortable with myself who I’ve come to be. I believe in love, treating others how you’d treat yourself, and a universal connection was between humans. I am far left, with a passionate view on poverty, addiction, prison cycle, generational trauma, and the horrendous affects of capitalism and gentrification. All in all I believe most humans are inherently good people, with select reasons “bad” people become bad. BF likes to linger on situations when “bad” people inconvenience him. Ex. A homeless man came up to us and asked for cash or food, I politely declined and he started walking away. My bf gave me a look of astonishment he would dare come up to the table. The homeless man, not even seeing this, started yelling bitch and screaming and jumped 180 to face us. His face contorted up and he flashed a middle finger. I saw someone in a lot of pain with no hope and angry at the world, it’s nothing personal. But my boyfriend got extremely angry and said he’s lucky the man didn’t get close otherwise he’d punch him out. “How dare he think he’s entitled to my food and money” Ex. 2 two young teenagers stole a door dash bag from the counter on his shift. He texts me how the he hates scummy teenagers who just steal shit for fun. When I was trying to brush it off by staying “lol stupid kid” he continued to make fun of how scared the kid was when he caught up to them. I mentioned how kids stealing food might come from a harsh background, and he can let go the situation and hope those kids are being fed at home. He did his job getting back the food. He did not stop pushing that it was a reckless brat wasting his time, the kid wasn’t even smart enough to go for the tips, etc. These are two examples that happened very recently, and I’m really starting to notice it’s a trait I do not vibe with. He treats me good, he treats his and my family good, his coworkers and friends. But I think we hold the most power when we are kind to strangers, and that means not getting stuck on the sucky things they do sometimes. Because this as to do with morality, I am terrified of pushing what I think onto him. I don’t want to imply in anyway that he’s inherently bad (it’s my whole thing right). But I would like to either not hear him complain about the strangers im empathic for, or encourage a more positive way of thinking. TDLR: I don’t comprehend why you’d be mad at homeless addicts or “rebellious” teenagers, should I just tell him to shut up about it or work towards a more aligned point of view?
2020.09.13 18:55 swanlaikeHow I Got into Stanford (+ Harvard, Columbia, UPenn, Princeton) as an Average Student
As a sophomore attending Stanford, I wanted to share my journey of applying to college and the factors that made me stand out amongst my peers (hopefully, this will help your application process as well!). Honestly, I consider myself a 'Pro Ultra Deluxe Reddit Academia Lurker' because I have used Reddit for every single aspect of my application (finding free SAT/ACT practice tests, browsing other people's specs, jotting down tips from successful applicants), so I wanted to share my knowledge with the masses. EDIT: I put "average" in the title, but I just want to mention that my test scores are definitely not average on a nationwide perspective. I was simply average compared to my graduating class. There were tons students in our class with better specs than me (better scores, better extracurriculars, higher math levels, more APs, full score subject test results, legacy students, sports scholar, ect). I titled this post in the scope of our own little high school bubble, so it may be misleading. GENERAL INFO:
Bio: Female, Asian, U.S. citizen, no legacy
GPA: 4.5 Weighted (don't know about unweighted bc our school only shows one)
Class Rank: probably in the top 10-15% out of 620 students
Standardized Testing: 1570 SAT, 35 ACT (no subject tests)
APs: 12 (straight As except for an A- in physics and calculus ab)
EC: Class Council VP, English Honor Society President, Editor-in-Chief of the Newspaper Club, created a Shakespeare Club for lit nerds, NHS, Science Honor Society (just a casual member), 300 hours of volunteering throughout four years
Awards/Honors: Scholastic Art Award Winner (Gold Key x4), Scholastic Writing Award (Gold x2, Silver x2), published poems in our local newspaper, won a few school writing contests, National AP Scholar, oh and the honor roll-thingy schools give out every year
Recs: received from my AP teachers who only knew me for a year, just the average "love how polite, kind, and smart this student is!" letter
Essays: 10/10, I shall explain why
Financial Aid: Did not apply (explained later)
Application: all regular decision
Why I Believed Others Were More Qualified The school county that I attended was known for having one of the most rigorous and competitive academics in the nation. Naturally, the students who attended reflected those ideals. I had 300 volunteering hours, but that was absolute garbage compared to the girl who had been receiving awards for 1,500 service hours since MIDDLE SCHOOL ! There was also a good chunk of kids who were in a higher math level than me (and boyyyy were they arrogant...) These same kids would create functional computers from scratch, intern in the White House/NASA, win tons of gold medals in science olympiad (and placing first nationally), and all around just impossible things for teenagers to imagine. Stanford has been my dream school, but I quickly gave up on that idea when I learned a fellow classmate (who I deemed better than I ever would be) also had Stanford as their dream school. Let's call her, Emily -- Emily was the Asian daughter that I had always aspired to be: captain of the tennis club, champion of science awards, the booty-licker of all teachers, 1600 SAT score + perfect subject tests, conqueror of multivariable calculus, perfect report card since birth, 4.7 GPA, volunteered in an undeveloped country, coded a phone app, future pre-med neuroscience legend, leader of a church youth group, bold, brave, and oh yeah a snake. Emily always assumed that Stanford was going to accept her and BY GOD she had all the means to achieve it. She would use caffeine pills to stay up all night to study, hired tutors to co-write her essays, went to a monthly SAT training camp, convinced teachers to let her co-write the rec letters, made up stories in her personal essays to sound more impactful, and rehearsed interview questions with Ivy League alumnus, and who knows what else... Honestly, I thought all T20 schools were meant for people like her; cut-throat, competitive, insanely brilliant, and haughty. (I was pleasantly surprised when I arrived at Stanford and most people were actually...human... but 25% of students are still Emily replicas lmao) I always knew that I would apply to some Ivys because I genuinely believed that I had at least a 10% shot with my standardized tests alone. However, I crossed out Stanford because that was reserved for Emily. In the afternoon of one wintery day, I received a surprising Facetime call from my friend. 'Yooooooo', she began in a sing-sang voice. 'Guess who applied for Stanford early decision and got denied? It was Emily!' she cackled. I think my heart stopped in that moment. I don't believe myself to be a cruel person; I genuinely felt bad for Emily who had dedicated her entire high school career into building a resumé for Stanford. Yet, I was proud of Stanford for being able to distinguish between an authentic student versus one with a fake persona. That night (2 days before the application deadline btw) I wrote my Stanford essays in a frenzy and sent them in. Spring brought joyous tears as I opened my application portal and read the magic word, 'Congratulations'. Why I Got In (Realistic)
Look at my SAT/ACT scores, bro. Sorry to break it to you-- but your scores need to meet the average threshold of that particular college you're applying to. Applying with a 1410 to a school that has a 1520 SAT average is not realistic... unless you're a 1) prodigy who is going to change the world, 2) legacy and loaded with money, 3) famous and well known throughout the nation. I understand that it's hard, but I feel that -- if you have time-- you can master standardized testing. I haven't gone to any prep schools in my entire life, I solely relied on the internet (khan academy, sat & act reddit subs, crack act) to better my scores.
I submitted an art portfolio that matched the awards I earned. I believe that added a lot of character to my application and separated me from the 'smart Asian kid' stigma.
My application was well-rounded. I wasn't in a rush to submit things for the Early Decision deadline. I really took my time to polish every single word in my application to reflect my personality and who I was as a person. My advice is: your admissions officer should feel like he just went on an hour-long blind date with you and fell in love with you.
While I wrote my Stanford essays super last minute, I already had a general idea of how to introduce myself from writing all my other college essays. I just re-used and recycled my words. Plus, I truly believe my personal essay was great. I had my AP Lit teacher review it with me several times and she teared up/ laughed every time she read it. Out of the 200 essays that she read, mine was the only one which received an A grade. Writing is hard, I get it. I'm not in a position to teach you how to write. I've been in love with writing and reading since the fifth grade so I can't give you a 'How I Improved in 6 Months' guide. However, asking for help and having teachers review it is VERY helpful.
I didn't apply for financial aid. I thought it would hinder my acceptance chances because colleges would see me as a leech on their resources. I have no way to confirm whether this helped my application, but being able to pay yourself does seem incentivizing to these institutions who greatly value money.
Interviews!! Loved them!! Genuinely laughed and had a coffee date with all of them. The key formula is to roughly introduce yourself to them for 10-15 minutes, highlight NEW things about yourself (that are not already in your application) for 15-20 minutes, and just answer their questions honestly. Also, be sure to research the school and ask them questions that they can answer in-depth. Please don't talk over your interviewer and listen to what they are saying as well.
Again, essays are the essence of your application. Extracurriculars are great, but it's what you mention in your writing that will truly stick with the readers. The golden ratio of importance is probably 55% essays and 45% testing scores/GPA.
My Advice for 2020 Applicants
Your essays matter more now than ever. Take the time to perfect it.
If your SAT/ACT scores are bad, then this is the best opportunity to omit them.
If your SAT/ACT scores are above average, then this is also a great time to submit them and add something new to your application.
Believe in yourself. These schools believe in you and give you a fair chance when they read over your application. No one is more worthy or deserving than you. Please take the first leap of faith.
Good luck! Feel free to message me with questions about college, Stanford and the Ivys, or standardized testing. I'm here for you, just like the sub was here for me :) p.s. Emily didn't get accepted into any T20 school
2020.09.13 09:28 Nexomy_RedI'm too much of a loner for my girlfriend
Hi everyone! I hope you had a great day, and I hope you're ready for some gay teenage angst, because that's what you're getting! So I (17f) have fallen head over heals for the smartest, kindest, most beautiful girl ever(Also 17f). And, turns out she's fallen for me too!!! (Don't ask, I'm not really sure why either) A bit of background would be... We've been close friends for a year, talked on the phone a shit ton on quarantine, I confessed a lil over a month ago, and we've been official for a week. We're pretty good at communicating. We can talk about anything, and I already mentioned this issue before, but I feel like it's something that could spiral out of control quite easily. I'm... Not a people person. At all. During quarantine, what I missed most is my alone time, since my mother and brother were stuck inside with me. If it were that we fight all the time, I'd get it, but nope. I love them and we barely have petty arguments. We have golden communication. And I still get exhausted having them around at all times. And it's not as if I don't like talking, I really, really do. It's just... Them being in the same space as me. Idk how to explain it. I also don't miss people alot. It tends to take a week or two without a talk before I start feeling it, and around 6 months to make me cry, only if I really, really love the person. In short, while the ones I love are my top priority in life, I tend to relish in any alone time I can get. While my girlfriend... Doesn't. She doesn't like to be alone, at all. She misses me a lot if we can't see eachother during the weekend. If I don't sit with her and our other friends at lunch. If we don't talk after school. She doesn't even like to go to her locker alone, and always asks a friend to tag along with her. Now, I don't mind this that much. During quarantine, we talked 5h a day minimum, EVERY DAY, for two months. I didn't grow tired or anything, I still had time with my family, with my other friends, and a good three hours alone. But now school started. Yep. Shit. Now, everyday, I lose all my alone time. I should hope to catch up after school, but I get home, shower, homework, eat, family time... And it's 20h. Now I get to be free, right? Not really. I get a text. We call. Three hours past. I should go to bed. But... I didn't have my alone time. Ah. Well... All that's left to do is to stay awake for another 3h to recharge, and then get to school on 4h of sleep, when I need 10. Great. See the problem? Now, I don't want to make my GF feel unloved, or lonely, or like she's annoying. Because she isn't. She's literally better than what I ever dreamed of. I love her. BUT. As the school year moves on, and as my energy lowers... I ain't gon keep up. It's been two weeks and I've already sacrificed all my friend time, most of my family time, and a lot of sleep to keep up with my social battery, homework and her. It sucks. I really want to be one of those lovestruck teenagers that could talk on the phone for hours, and I am, I guess, but school is taking way too much of a toll on me. I don't know what to do. Do you guys have any tips? How do I figure this out? I just want her to feel loved my dudes, cause she is. My "alone time" is often spent just writing about how much I love and care for her, or doodling us on romantic dates. It's just... People are exhausting guys. I dunno what to tell ya. Welp, any help or advice is appreciated, from an introvert to others, I suppose. I mean what are the extroverts even doing on Reddit really.
2020.09.12 22:02 roadrollarA guide to dating as a teenager!
Ok so I can't wait to share my tips with you on how to be the best at dating as a teenager! Anyway let's start! 1.Don't. Just don't even attempt it. A relationship isn't just nice dates and hot smex like alot of teens think it is. It requires much more dedication than you think. Anyway that was my amazing guide on how to date as a teen! Edit:No I didn't get rejected or dumped. I'm kinda just sick of seeing people around my age always focusing on dating and sex. I probably should have worded this better do. I'm not some Incel lol. Also I should probably mention /S.
2020.09.11 21:10 seven_N_A7Everyday info sec, hardcore info sec, and DNMs
Edit: Since first post I have updated a few sections with additional information. I recommend reading it all even if it is very long, I might have placed some relevant info in different sections while thinking about what else needed to be added, plenty of steps remains mostly the same except when I comment directly on it. It is not necessary to do 100% security all the time, unless you absolutely need it, combining some high and some lower security ideas for a balance of security and convenience is useful. I will base this mostly on Windows, Linux users probably know this, and I have no idea how apple machines work (tho many things in here are still relevant for other operating systems, as they are just general tips) Disclaimer: There are certainly other steps that can make you more anonymous or safer, however I think for most people this will surfice. Any software I recommend should be independently verified for security, and examples of software are not to be taken as endorsements. I simply use examples and give recommendations when I believe it necessary, or helpful. I will not really differentiate between anonymity and security, they are often the same thing. As such the word security can mean either more anonymous, less vulnerable, or both. -------- Everyday Simple Info Sec:
Password for the device is an obvious one (8+ characters minimum, best if over +12), if there is sensitive information on any of the drives, either encrypt the entire drive or just the sensitive files, and make encrypted backups on a different memory storage device (There many programs to encrypt files and drives I'm sure a search will figure it out)
-There could be a hidden administrator user on your PC, make sure to change its password
Always use the device on a non admin account
a VPN that doesn't log (use with kill switch on, should be enough for everyday stuff, more safe stuff in the high security section) (VPNs that claim they don't log sometimes do, it's bad, but I would like to point out that not using a VPN will always expose your traffic to your ISP and also remove additional encryption. Even if the VPN tracks, there is no downside because your ISP would track anyways, and VPNs can be more anonymous, and also add extra encryption)
disable location tracking (preferably make all your privacy setting to release minimal info, get rid or cortana, change privacy settings in all of your accounts as well, there's no reason why you should allow Facebook to give you target ads. Use the setting they give you.
TOR, Firefox or similar browser, stay the fuck away from Google Chrome.
your preferred search engine should be duckduckgo (other privacy focused search engines exist as well)
use an adblocker that also prevents the adding of tacking cookies
Use pgp with all your friends or messaging services that implemented end to end encryption (Implemented services can still be bypassed, but are way more convenient so for everyday use they should suffice, some examples should be Telegraph, Signal, WhatsApp etc) (more info on pgp in high security section)
(Snapchat msgs, reddit dms, discord msgs, are just a few examples of msgs that are never encrypted) -Any info even send in encrypted msgs (and obviously non encrypted) should still be kept with possible deniability, don't say "I'm gonna do MDMA", say "I'm going out with molly."
use software (like ccleaner) that purges cookies and other data after every use, before shutting down your device
use a virus scanner daily (I like spy bot Search and destroy, many other options also exist)
never use the same password/passphrase twice (I will address what passphrase are below) (Better yet use randomized passwords that are stored in a master key chain, make them as long as possible (tho it is okay to go with the minimum of 12 never go below 7, I recommend 15+ depending on how often you have to manually enter the password instead of copying/pasting it) Don't generate too long keys for things you need to access regularly without copy/paste, except your master key ring)
its ideal to never use the same email or username as well, especially username, email is obviously tricky and also very annoying, but it would be best to always change the email.
-DO NOT STORE ANY PASSWORDS ON GOOGLE, IF GOOGLE LOGIN IS AUTHENTICATED IT WILL AUTFILL ALL PASSWORDS IT HAS SAVED (same with other similar services) (This means if you are logged in to chrome and someone has access to your machine, they can auto fill passwords without entering a single password) -use a rememberable passphrase, especially for your master key ring aka password manager A long sentence that is memorable makes an okay password (decent example,: "I met my wife at Little Ceasers for the first time on 07/09/20" better even if it's just something you know, if its impersonal, and if you can add special characters or numbers that you won't forget) (A better example for a passphrase is: "There is 0nly 0ne letter that d0esn’t appear in any U.S. state nameQ")
for your main password manager(key ring), I highly recommend Keepass 2, make backups of the file save to separate devices and drives (Flash drives, phone, PC, laptop, etc, if you loose that file, you lose all of your passwords) (Other good password managers exist as well, I don't recommend online password managers as you lose the control over passwords)
-Purge your internet activity frequently, there's a reason why I only have one post, and a few comments appearing in my account, but thousands of kama. Exposing information needlessly is not good. -Never post private information publicly, and if you do, do it vaguely as possible. (Example: Not "I'm 15", say "I'm a teenager") Do not post any vital information ever, no birthdays, mother's maiden name, age, or anything you have ever seen in a security question. Never post your current activities while they are ongoing. You going on a vacation? Don't announce it to the world, taking picture there? Post them when you are home.
Any account that is supposed to remain anonymous and as secure as possible should only be used on secured devices. A unsecured device can link you to the account.
always shutdown your machine when leaving it (To prevent access, and to prevent a possible attack vector)
2 factor factor authentication is not great anymore. Unless you can do it over a anonymous source. A cell phone is usually directly connected to you, so it is not a anonymous device. There might still be secure/anonymous 2 factor authentication methods that won't expose you, for example over a secure email. (If there is 2FA that doesn't need a device that removes anonymity and is secure, use it.) (Please don't misunderstand, 2FA is great, however it can remove the anonymity that you worked hard to establish)
-Rethink how you do security questions. Many answers to security questions can be found in your internet history. One could use the first word of the security question as an answer, or a different sceme that will mean you always remember it. (Security question need to go, the amount of personal info an average person puts on the internet makes it easy to attack anything using security question) -------_ High level crimimal information security: The motto here is, "All the Security, All the Time" As one fuck up can end with you leaving a lick of traceability, and you could be fucked. Pre Note: All of your software should always be up to date. Also even perfect info sec does not guarantee you are completely safe, a new zero day (exploit) can still fuck you, but good info security makes you significantly safer, by eliminating as many attacks as possible. -Get a new device (or make a already owned device seem like you never owned it, do this only if you know how to, there's a lot of stuff that goes into that, like changing your mac adress etc) buy with cash, and your face covered, preferably far away from where you live. (Do I need to specify to not bring your phone or anything else that tracks your location to anywhere you want to go anonymously?) (Be aware that even hardware can have vulnerabilities, many cpus have known vulnerabilities, I can't list them all, do some research before buying)
Do not EVER use a high security device at any lower level of security. There are unique identifiers to your device, exposing them once can expose you for everything you do.
-If you know how to use Tails (A linux distro designed for Info sec) use that, preferably on a USB. (Or learn how to use tails, its better, but complicated) Otherwise a clean copy of windows (make sure its not in any way associated with you) can do the job too, tho not as well. (Using a VM might give extra security, since VMs usually erase all data and RAM they were using on shutdown) -Get a non tracking VPN, Enable the kill switch (a setting that disables all traffic that doesn't go through the VPN) (change your firewall settings to only allow the traffic from the VPN, windows guide (Change settings so only traffic from the tor application is send) Edit: (Due to complaints: do not use vpn over tor, use tor over vpn. tor over vpn has no notable downside, if the VPN logs it makes no difference, your ISP will always log anyways, and vpns remove other attack vectors and also provide backup security should tor fail. Again even if the VPN tracks you only change the people doing the tracking, but now you are further removed making it more anonymous and also with less vulnerabilities) -rember privacy settings, cookie cleaner, and antivirus, password (There could be a hidden administrator user on your PC, make sure to change its password) -Always use the device on a non admin account
-Ideally use this device only on networks that are not connected with you. Such as public networks (try to never use the same public networks twice, move around) (a home network should be fine now, as it should never be exposed, but more security is always better) (Its just a conveniences vs security trade) -Never use accounts that have been exposed to lower security on higher security machines -your browser is now TOR (or your preferred security focused browser, if you dont plan on using onion ) Make sure you get the standalone version of tor not the addon build (the standalone is safer, because there are less settings and options to tweak) -Change your tor settings, to safest mode, enable a bridge (to my knowledge there's no difference in security between the build in bridges in tor), enable automatic updates, set duckduckgo onion as your primary browser. Set dark.fail onion page as your home page. (Or your preferred privacy search engine and onion directory)
set up a new pgp (can't use the same one you use for regular use, again less safer accounts are never used on safer devices) Cleopatra is my choice, its simple to use. Make sure you back up the private key multiple times, on safe devices. (Dont let the private key fall into anyone's hands) Give it a generic name like "HighSecurityPGP" do not give the pgp key pair a name that could identify you. (No initials etc) (Some pgp key pair programs want an associated email for a key pair, you can create a safe email, or which I recoend you can use a different program (like Cleopatra) (Feds & LEOs are known to copy private keys if they have your machine, so you will need to set up a new key pair if they ever take a device with a private key copy)
a high security machine that facilitates criminal activity can not use many programs. Many programs collect your devices mac adress, which is a unique identifier, amongst other things. It's should be used only for the activity you want to do.
-------_ How to use dark net markets (DNMs) If you finished your High Security setup, we can dive right in. Otherwise go do that. This is where all that is essential. Quick info on Tor, and onion sites. There is no search engine. It's all based of directories and addresses you are given by others. Tor will likely not be very quick, it has to pass through multiple networks to get to the destination. DNMs sometimes exit scam, an exit scam is when a market shuts down completely and takes all the money, this is a risk when using DNMs, it's not too common but happens maybe 0-4 times a year. The admins of thoese servers need to get out at some point, before they get jailed, so they exit the game, and scam everyone out of their money. -A very useful onion directory is dark.fail it has a lot of links, for all kinds of stuff. News, email, DNMs, Psychonautwiki (harm reduction website), forums etc. (Other directories also exist) -Pick a market, preferably one that handles secure connection server side instead of requiring you to establish the secure connection. Then create an account. Your account once created should include an entry box in your profile for a pgp key, post your PUBLIC key in there. (Verify the link is not a scam, most markets should provide a pgp signature) -Next is currency setup. All major cryptocurrency exchangers can be used, I can recommend coin base but there could be better ones out there. Unless you find a small non U.S., exchange, they will always ask for your identity. So unless you can find a trustworthy exchange that doesn't ID, you will need to give it to them. (Side note, all major crypto exchangers report to the IRS, if the IRS asks you if you bought cryptocurrency and you bought while having IDed yourself SAY YES, DO NOT COMMIT TAX FRAUD WHEN THEY KNOW YOU DID)
I recommend using Monero, it's hard to track, so it makes your job a lot easier. (If you use bitcoin you should run it through a scrambler, because BTC is tracable to anyone who knows what they are doing)
-Transfer (monero you can send directly, btc you should scramble) to your wallet. There are two options a cold wallet (physical) or a software wallet. Software wallets usually dont cost anything so I recommend them, even if often less safe. Electrum is easy to use, and pretty safe. You can also do your own research and find a wallet that fits your needs.
decide where you want to ship it. You can send to your home, to a PO box, to a PO box that you opened with a fake ID, a abandoned house. These are some options, sending it to your own home, isn't ideal, but its pretty much the only easy way.
-now you are ready to buy, only buy using escrow (it means the money is held by the market as a middle man until the product is delivered, they will also handle any issues like wrong quantity, cuts, etc), judge the reviews for a product, and if available look at the history of the vendor, until you find a product from a vendor you trust. (I recommend to buy within your country as much as possible, so it doesn't go through customs, it's very rare that something is found, but it can happen) -now you get to buy, depending on market, you either have cryptocurrency stored in their wallets (not recommend, you will lose it in an exit scam) or you can send it every order. When you send your delivery adress (or the one you want it to go to) encrypt the adress using the sellers public key. Make sure the adress is correct. -wait for the product, make sure to extend the escrow until the product arrives, if you can't extend it anymore dispute the order, and a moderator will step in -test the product, use it, and leave a review. PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW, DNMs only work because of reviews. Edit: Didn't imagine I would write over 15000 words. Oh well, it was fun. Hope it helps, if you have any questions feel free to ask. No idea how long this will stay up, I might purge it in 7 days, or never.
2020.09.11 07:08 CyberFire068All my life I have felt unattractive, boring, and just someone no one wants to spend time with
I’m a teenager (is prefer not to give out my age) and I’ve had lots of crushes, but no one has see yes, I always get rejected. I don’t blame it on them (I know that they just aren’t into me and it’s not their fault) I blame myself, I always think stuff like “your too fat and disgusting”, “your a nerd”, “you stupid piece of shit, no wonder she rejected you” etc. I consider myself to be a really nice person, I’m selfless and I truly care about other people and I listen to them instead of just waiting for my turn to speak. for a while I had just said fuck it! I’m done! I’m not gonna risk it. But now I feel like I just want to experience dating at my age, even if it’s just 1 week, I could finally know what it’s like. So how do I boost my confidence, how can I be more interesting, or even how can I just be happy the way things are? (and if anyone has any other tips to share that’s great!) Idk it’s late and I’m just rambling on at this point. Edit: I forgot to mention that this goes a little beyond wanting to date, I mainly just want to be confident and not hold my tongue all the time
2020.09.10 16:00 Angel466[Bob the hobo] A Celestial Wars Spin-Off Part 0156
PART ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY-SIX “Goodbye, Mr Masters.” Boyd barely heard the parting words of his former supervisor, but the resonating click of the disconnecting phone call echoed in his ears, sounding the end of everything to him. Heat and numbness prickled through his body and the next thing he remembered; his point of view shifted several feet towards the ground. Everything around him grew in intensity. Instead of blending in, the soft pink wall paint across from him jarred heavily with the timber architrave accents and even the different grains within the timber clashed. The legs of the chairs were different again, the silver metal gleaming as the tip of each was buried into the plush carpet. Even the carpet itself. Every thread of the rich green textile twisted like a budding plant, faded at the top to give it a polyp-like look. He couldn’t hear anything over the rushing of blood in his ears. No, he thought to himself, unable to align his frozen throat to say the word aloud. Dear God, no… Having rung Dr Kearns, his receptionist had said there were no vacancies for that day unless he felt there was a chance he might harm himself. Boyd was never going to take the coward’s way out of life, and as such, the earliest appointment had been in four days’ time. But now that he had decided this course of action, Boyd hadn’t wanted to wait and asked if he could come in on the off-chance there might be a last-minute cancellation. Diane had said he could, and so an hour later he’d been sitting in the small waiting room opposite an older couple and what he assumed was their teenaged son. The look of sadness and longing in the boy’s eyes was one Boyd could relate to and he’d mentally willed the kid to keep his chin up. Doctor Kearns was one of the best. And he should know. He’d been coming to see Doctor Kearns for over a decade and up until very recently, he’d thought himself virtually cured. After that, he waited ... ...and waited. The kid and his parents came and went, as did many others. While he sat in the waiting room, he began to go through his messages. The ones from his friends on the job site were the most concerning. They started out well enough. Dude, where are you? Is everything okay? But they quickly devolved into, Boyd, where the fuck are you? Pick up your fucking phone, man! Ruffalo is ready to blow a gasket at you! Dude, I am going to kick your gigantic ass if you don’t call me back in the next ten seconds! Boyd hit the call number attached to his friend’s text, fully expecting it to go to voicemail. Which it did, because no one ever heard their phones on the site, and distinguishing vibrations while heavy construction equipment was running was nothing short of a fucking joke. (Technically, they weren’t even supposed to have them once the shift whistle sounded, though no one listened to that rule). So he quickly sent his friends a mass: ‘Im alive but at the docs. Talk soon’ text, then went onto the more unpleasant missed calls. Specifically, Mr Ruffalo. His friends had already warned him the boss was pissed, so as he rang that number, he rose to his feet and took it in the hallway outside. The call had been brief. Two words really. Well, there were others, of course. Mainly from him, pleading to be given another chance, but apparently two lots of unapproved absences within two weeks of each other was more than the company was willing to tolerate. Not even the reminder that in the last three days he’d already worked a week and a half’s worth of hours changed their mind. “You used to be a reliable asset to this company, Mr Masters, but we need boots on the ground every day. Not just days that suit you to turn up. Whatever your reasons, you’ve become a liability that we aren't prepared to accommodate anymore. Effective immediately, your employment at Brahms’ Construction is terminated. Goodbye, Mr Masters.” And with that, he was fired. The only thing that got him up in the mornings was gone. His eyes stung, but he couldn’t find it in himself to blink. He had nothing. He was nothing. His grandfather’s parting words about being a disgrace to the family attacked him from several directions, blending in with Mr Ruffalo’s comment about being a liability, drowning out everything else. “Boyd?” he heard someone ask over the roar in his ears, but they sounded a million miles away. “Boyd, I need you to look at me, son.” Son? He didn’t deserve to be anyone’s son. He couldn’t even keep his job as a civilian. Something billions of people all over the world accomplished every day. Even the most deadbeat ones. He was a complete failure on every level. Still, the voice persisted. “Boyd, I’m going to put my hand in yours so that you can feel it and know that you’re not alone. And then I want you to turn your head to the left and look at me. Can you do that for me, Boyd?” Contact was made with his left hand. Soft, firm contact that curled around his palm, giving him something to anchor to. It squeezed, but not in a bad way. It was a show of strength. A show of support. To prove to him that whatever was behind that contact had the strength to help him. “That’s it,” the man said with an encouraging smile as Boyd slowly slid his eyes to his left. “Keep coming, Boyd. I need you back in the now.” Boyd stared blankly at the man’s face for several long seconds until he finally registered it was Dr Kearns. And when he did, something akin to a wall broke inside him, leaving him panting without ever getting enough oxygen. A chill swept through him as his sweat mingled with the cool air of the room’s air conditioning and every breath stung his throat. Dr Kearns’ smile grew. “Good … good,” he crooned, as Boyd blinked with a start and got his bearings. Why was he sitting on the floor? And why was Doctor Kearns kneeling beside him? When had that happened? His eyes moved from one person to the next standing in the hallway and he recognised the judgement in their eyes too. “No, don’t be fixating on them, Boyd,” Dr Kearns said, shifting his weight to block his view of the small crowd gathering around them. “Just focus on me and take your time. Breathe with me. In through the nose …” The breathing exercise was one he hadn’t needed in forever, but years of being subjected to this process had him sucking in a jittery breath automatically. “… and out through the mouth.” Which he did. Having something regimented, even if it was just his breathing, brought a sense of calm to him. “Good. And again.” Boyd complied. Six more times. Each time he felt his breathing steady and a little bit more of the world fell back into place. “Ye’ got this, Oliver?” he heard one of the other people ask in a strong accent. “Yes,” Dr Kearns answered, never once taking his focus off of Boyd. “Thanks, Seamus.” He shifted his weight, leaning away as if to stand. His hand tightened around Boyd’s. “You’re going to have to help me out a little here, Boyd,” he said. “We need to get you on your feet to go back inside, and my days of carrying someone your size are a long way behind me.” He gave the hand a small tug and rose into a half squat with his other hand braced against the wall Boyd was leaning on. “Come on, Boyd. Up you get.” Boyd wasn’t sure at what point the muscles of his body had been replaced with lead, but with Dr Kearns’ help, he found his feet and together, they went back into Dr Kearns’ waiting room. Boyd still felt as if he was walking in a partial dream. “Clear my afternoon, Dianne,” the older man said, as they went past the small reception area and into the office Boyd knew better than his own bedroom. He slid down into the left-hand side of a two-seater lounge beside the door. Dr Kearns closed the door and broke contact with him just long enough to go to a sideboard and pour a glass of water. When he returned, he pushed the glass into Boyd’s hands and curled his fingers around it. “Slow, small sips,” he instructed, as Boyd stared at the clear contents, trying to remember what he was supposed to be doing with it. He then pulled a single chair to be within reaching distance on the couch and leaned forward, bracing his forearms on his knees. “So,” he said after Boyd took a tiny sip of water. “Where would you like to start?” “Sam’s dad came back into the picture last month,” Boyd answered, figuring that was as good a place as any. Dr Kearns was already well aware of every facet of Boyd’s life and gave no indication that he thought less of Boyd for waiting so long to come in. “And how do you feel about that?” How indeed. * * * PART ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY-SEVEN Previous Part 155 ((All comments welcome)) I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be foundhere For more of my work including previous parts or WPs:Angel466 or indexed here FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUNDHERE!!
2020.09.10 12:24 Free_PinThe price of being a woman - especially hair removal - makes me feel dispair
This rage usually surfaces for me on "hair removal days"... among other times as well but mostly this. I've done well to cut out some of the other major female expenses through things like the diva cup and period panties in that respect. But... there is just simply, absolutely, no way around hair removal... if you're gonna remove it. Shaving - expensive long term and doesn't work for me. I have thick, dark, fast-growing hair. Ever since I was young, if I shaved in the morning, I would get stubble that evening. When I became sexually active I felt like just the thought of planning when to shave took up a certain small percentage of my brain capacity at all times. Going on a date? But also going to the park on a hot day the day before? Do I shave for the park or do I shave for the guy? Because, at least for me, I can't shave my stubble, I get horrible razor burn and strawberry legs. Then the cost of the razors, thankfully there are more companies aimed towards women now who are making them cheaper but DAMN when I was a teenager, the Venus Embrace was the best razor, bottom line. All of those cheap Bic razors did horrible things to my legs. $24 for four cartridges of the Embrace heads... which you're supposed to switch out every three shaves... I usually went five but the dullness was noticeable. Epilators - Great if this works for you, but it didn't work for me, again, the thick hair. I purchased a $60 epilator and gave it a few chances. It took me an hour per leg, and it never really worked that well. It usually just broke my hair and was extremely painful. Waxing - When I was 18 and finally had my first retail job, I broke up with shaving for the first time. I wound up going to a very aggressive Italian woman's tiny salon for my first Brazilian wax. I was scared shitless... but she was amazing. I saw her every month for a whole year. (Pro-tip for those who are new to Brazilian/bikini waxing - go to someone who won't let you wuss out lol, have no mercy). This is when I realized how much of a commitment waxing really was. You have to stick with it (no pun) or else you ruin your progress. It really hurts the first few times and everything doesn't always come off, but if you commit, the hair gets thinner and thinner, you grow less and less, and the process gets less painful... but not less expensive. In the US the price of a full Brazillian can set you back $60 - $90 a month. Throw in a full leg? $125 a month. Sure, the more consistent you are the further apart your appointments will be, but this takes years and will never really end. Oh, and don't forget the tip, that nice lady just spent an hour of her life ripping the hair off of your asshole. In financially tight times in my young adult life I sometimes resorted to Veet wax strips... which work, but they take FOREVER to do... and the results aren't perfect. Honestly, this is probably the cheapest hair removal option because you only spend about $14 a month. Now in my mid-20s, feeling like a seasoned waxer, I decided to go ahead and get a wax pot and learn to do it myself. This was honestly, not cheaper than getting it done professionally, and not worth my time. It's a tough art to master. The pot is going to cost you $40 to $80, the liners, $14 for 5, the beads $30 for a bag... your time? Literally... hours. Sugaring - This is probably, truly, your cheapest option if you make it at home. But it's difficult to get right. After many tries, one day, I finally made a batch that worked. Cheap ingredients, less clean up, faster than DIY waxing. But again, difficult to perfect, and now I don't have a microwave where I live to warm up my wax. Laser. This is ultimately what I want to get... but also not a done deal either. I know, in my heart, that long term? It does turn out to be cheaper than all of the other options. Once you're done, save for a few maintenance sessions, it costs less than a lifetime of shaving and waxing. This doesn't work for everyone, only for those with high contrast between their hair and skin tone, but fortunately, I'm one of those who would benefit greatly. Unfortunately, I just don't have the money to shell out to get it all done. This is probably going to set you back $7000 to do the major bits, legs, bikini, armpits. Oh, and remember you have to shave before the sessions? Throw in the cost of a few razor cartridges. That's cheaper than the $68,570 that you'd spend on 50 years of professional waxing (I only counted 11 months rather than 12 to be generous too). Shaving? $14,400 for 50 years of buying Venus Embrace cartridges and switching them out at reasonably appropriate intervals. So, this is why I get mad when some young men in my generation think they're "modern" and want to split the cost of dinner and drinks with their female date. This is why I feel sad for the girl who thinks she's being "modern" agreeing to this crap. Because look at those numbers above, then factor in tampons, makeup, haircuts, the cost of extra Ubers or cabs because you don't want to walk home alone in the dark, having one additional doctor on top of the others just for your vagina, birth control, and then cap it all of with the glass ceiling. And all of this just being a choice? Well, it isn't really. Because we need to meet these grooming standards to even be considered for a job, or a promotion, to try to make more money, so that we can pay for more of this shit or at least not have these expenses hold us back so much. Sure we live in a progressive society, whatever. If I abandon all of these female practices, I'm not going to get the job. It's just how it is. I'd love to change, I'd love for society to change, but I truly don't think that we'll see that drastic of a perspective shift within our lifetime. We're conditioned for these things, even me, someone who resents it so much, I think that smooth legs are nicer than hairy ones. I don't want my pubes popping out of my swimsuit. I like makeup. It would be difficult enough for me to try to overcome my own indoctrination, I can't see all of society doing the same anytime soon. But that's ok. We like the things we like. I just want a salary that supports these rituals that are expected of us. I want men, or those who don't have to do these things to pay for dinner, drinks, and the taxi, if they're on a date with someone who does. I wish that this was an expense in a committed relationship that was normal to be shared.
2020.09.09 22:27 captain_kenobiMy [24 M] friend [25 F] and I are long term friends who recently acknowledged we're attracted to each other but can't/won't go further
It's going to be difficult to properly explain but I'll do my best. We've known each other since we were teenagers. We dated a bit in high school but things ended when we were at different unis and lacked the emotional maturity to make things work. In this time, I went to visit her and her family a lot as my own family was too far away for a weekend visit. Her family adores me and still invited me to family events and to just visit after we broke up. (This is important, she has some issues with feeling like they picked me over her and I agree with how she feels, they did a poor job of validating her feelings and letting her vent without judgement) After the initial breakup nastiness, we resumed being friends. Relatively distant friends but we'd still talk from time to time. Because of my bond to her family, we see each other on a fairly regular basis despite me living in a different city. I tried and failed to get over her multiple times. I've gotten out there and tried to forget but I just can't. I've a couple of half assed attempts at relationships with other girls but it always felt incredibly forced. Whereas with my friend we can talk for hours and be on the same page the entire time or sit in silence and be perfectly content. She is aware that my feelings for her keep coming back. I was never overt about it, but she knows me well enough to read me like a book. Lately, we've been closer than ever. We both started on our paths of self improvement and there's been something different between us. Personally, I worked hard on fixing my mental health issues and improving my emotional intelligence. It's helped a ton with active listening and empathy, helping me emotionally connect with several people in my life. It's led to her and I talking about and processing old wounds. When I go visit her family, at this point its just an excuse to see her and while I'm there we'll conspire to sneak off to we can talk in private without anyone butting in. This all came to a tipping point on my last visit. It was just the two of us there, everyone else was gone for the night and I decided to start the conversation. I told her how great things have been between us, that I think she's great, and how much our bond means to me. I told her I have some mixed feelings, that I want to try again and want to put in the work to figure out how to move forward, but I'm scared too because I know the societal norm would tell me talking to your ex like this is a bad idea. We had a long talk after that with a few big takeaways. My perception that something is different was correct. She said she finds me plenty attractive, which was a huge boost to hear. We acknowledged that there's an attraction between us. She also said she's not a point where she's ready to go beyond being friends. She cited needing to continue working on herself, and that saying yes to me now would feel like the easy out because I feel so strongly about her (She hasn't been on so much as a date since we broke up, saying yes to me represents being able to give up on putting herself out there). It was an amicable conversation that demonstrated a deep understanding of each other. We know details about each other that only a couple other souls, if any, know. Despite not hearing the answer I hoped for, it was still a cathartic conversation. At the end I told her I was sorry for making things weird, and promised to do my best to compartmentalize my emotions for the sake our friendship. As much as it crushes me, I truly love her and know that she truly values our friendship and I don't want to take that from her. It seems to me to be incredibly unfair to hold our bond hostage behind going out together. The last thing I said as I left was to let me know if she changed her mind, leaving that door propped open. I felt okay at first (even a little thrill at knowing she's into me on some levle), but as I'm back at work and back to life, my spirit feels broken. I just hurt. I've tread this ground before and know I won't get over her. Maybe if I cut all contact, but that would mean cutting nearly a dozen people I dearly care about out of my life (members of her family and mutual friends). But thats the nuclear option and I'd rather endure my pain than spread my pain to others. She's definitely interested in me and I'm convinced that she might change her mind with some time. Am I the worlds biggest fool for still clinging to hope? I'd started to feel safe and secure in my bubble of being single, and if we won't have a future it seems better to go back there and stay there. I'm looking for any perspective that might help. tl;dr: Long term friend and I have incredible friendship, mutual attraction, but its still not enough. She says she still needs to work on herself but doesn't want me to have false hope. I want nothing more in life than to grow old with her and just want to be numb if that can't happen (I'm aware it sounds dramatic). I don't know if I need hope, a stern talking to, or just patience and something to distract msyelf.
2020.09.09 14:41 ThrowRAHelpNeeded1Finally broke up with my BPD girlfriend
Yesterday, after almost 4 years (2 years living together) of being in a relationship with an undiagnosed BPD, I have broken up with my girlfriend. I've packed her stuff and I'll be sending them to her place tomorrow morning. We've been fighting for a month and a half after her last hysteric outburst, which happened for absolutely no reason. This was the first (and only) time I said she has crossed the line and I need some distance from her to think about our relationship, so I proposed a break for 30 days. All hell broke loose after she heard me say this for the first time, as she's totally used to me getting over her attacks for no reason. Some red flags that I have spotted throughout the years, which I didn't realize at the time, but which might be of help to someone:
She had been deeply depressed because of her last break-up prior to us starting dating.
Her last boyfriend left her cold turkey - without any explanation.
She once mentioned she tried to cut her wrist as a teenager because of a guy. I didn't take it seriously.
She never had any meaning, hobbies, ambitions or goals in life.
She spent most of her life on the couch and social media.
We became totally codependent. I paid for absolutely everything and worked crazy hours, while she cooked sometimes and cleaned occasionally. I had to help her with simple computer stuff after working 12 hours shifts, as she wasn't able to solve simple problems while being home all the time.
I helped her with every little task she needed for college.
She snapped on me every now and then for absolutely no reason, even despite the fact she had absolutely everything she needed in life to be happy.
She had very few friends if any and she almost never hung out with anyone.
She had a very hard time socializing and meeting new people or establishing new friendships.
She never blamed herself for any college, friendship or family-related issues. It was always the professors' or mothers' fault.
She comes from a very dysfunctional family, where her parents rarely communicate with each other, although they live together.
She constantly had dark and heavy thoughts in her head which made her very sad for most of the time.
She had disturbing nightmares where, for instance, her father would cut her mothers' head off and throw it in the toilet.
She isolated me from all of my friends because she wanted me 100% for herself.
She plaid the guilt card of me not spending enough time with her although I almost lost all of my friends and family in the process.
She said I'm the center of her world and I give meaning to her existence.
Once I proposed a break to think about our relationship after her last outbreak, she told me she'll commit suicide.
I drove her to her parents after she threatened she'll commit suicide in my apartment if we go on a break. I broke up with her via a phone call a couple of days later. She, of course, started saying why I didn't tell her we're breaking up while we were going through chaos in my apartment. I didn't bother to explain. Any tips on how to deal with life after breaking up with a person that had these issues? I'm trying to do NC at the moment. Thanks in advance.
2020.09.09 04:07 SkyBruceLee23[HR] [SF] LUCID by Skyler Woods
Justin could hear people screaming outside the elevator doors. It all started when the power went out. Justin had his 4-year-old daughter, Abigail, on the elevator with him. The young man had to be brave for his little girl. Something terrible was happening. At first, Justin felt lost, until he pulled out his phone and saw the news headlines. (A woman killed her fiance at a local nightclub. Witnesses say the woman decapitated him with her fingernails and teeth. Authorities shot the woman, killing her. But she came back to life hours later during an autopsy. The medical examiner escaped, but the woman killed his assistant.) (A woman turned into a white zombie after consuming an alcoholic beverage. She attacked two pedestrians and was shot down by police, but came back to life a few minutes later.) (Four women attacked a daycare center after leaving a local bar. Witnesses say the four women had snow-white skin and hair. The daycare’s security guards shot all four women, but now their bodies are missing from the Saint Augustine mortuary.) (A woman gets attacked by a deformed woman while out jogging. The victim reported that the woman had white skin and hair with black eyes. Doctors found traces of an alcoholic substance on the victim’s neck where the attacker bit her. The victim’s wounds were treated at the Saint Augustine hospital, but her hair and skin turned white as snow a few hours later. The infected victim became irate. She killed a nurse and two doctors before breaking out of the hospital.) These were the surreal news reports Justin read on his phone. He almost dropped his phone when he read the first news report. “Daddy, what’s going on?” Abigail’s sweet voice broke her father out of his frightened daze. Justin unglued his eyes from his phone screen. “I don’t know, Sweetie,” the man spoke to his daughter through a distressed half-whisper. Justin had his daughter in his arms while sitting on the elevator’s floor. It was dark in the elevator, but Justin could still see his daughter’s dollish face and the little sunflowers on her dress. “Is mommy gonna be okay?” Abigail mumbled. She held her daddy’s hand while laying her head against his chest. The little girl found comfort in listening to her father’s heartbeats. “Yeah, Baby, your mommy’s gonna be fine.” Justin assured his daughter. He tried to shut out the screaming by focusing on keeping his daughter comforted. “You wanna play Pattycake like we did last night!” Justin whispered excitedly to his daughter. The father did his best to take his daughter’s attention away from the screams. He laughed softly when his daughter nodded her head. The father and daughter quickly went into their Pattycake game. Justin tried to block out the screams while playing with his daughter. He also tried to block out the unreal news headlines he saw on his phone. Justin felt like he was in a horror movie. “Can you rap for me, Daddy? Abigail asked. The little girl loved it when her father would rap to her while playing Pattycake. Abigail’s father was a British rap star who sold three albums over the last five years. Instead of having a bedtime story read to her, Justin would rap to his daughter after tucking her into bed. Abigail enjoyed the last bedtime story her father told her the night before through his rapping style. The story was about a queen who fell in love with an imprisoned ninja warrior. “You want Daddy to rap for you?” Justin chuckled. The young man’s whispering and his English accent soothed his daughter. “Pretty baby with the sunshine smile. Brighter than a star with your explosive style. Your eyes like butterflies in the spring. Daddy can’t believe God blessed him with this cute little thing. You make a diamond jealous of your sparkling hair. Your little pretty face is like porcelain and your skin, so fair. When you grow up, girls are gonna hate. Their boyfriends are gonna chase your beauty, constantly asking for a date. When you grow up, you’ll find a guy and he better treat you right. If he doesn’t, yo Daddy’s gonna hunt him down and beat him in a fight. If you choose to have babies, you’ll be a wonderful mother like your mom, who loves you. She loves you more than anything in the world, and your daddy does too. Like a blooming flower. From a princess to a queen. You’re gonna always be Mommy and Daddy’s little goddess supreme.” Justin watched as his daughter gave him a glowing wide grin of approval. He loved how his little girl would give him the biggest smile every time he’d rap to her. Justin received a kiss on his curly beard from his daughter and he returned the favor, kissing his little girl on the tip of her nose. Justin wanted to keep playing Pattycake with his daughter, but his phone kept interrupting him. He kissed his daughter again while pulling his phone out. More news headlines bombarded Justin’s phone. (An 11-year-old girl escaped from her house after her mother attempted to kill her. The girl says that she found her mother in the basement naked and eating their dog. The girl also says that she found her father’s body in the bathroom with his throat ripped open. The girl’s mother became deformed after drinking a fruit-flavored beer called Lucid. The girl says her mother’s eyes were pitch black. She also reported to authorities that her mother’s body became anorexic and her skin and hair looked like snow.) (Police arrested the CEO of a Moscow beer manufacturer called Lucid for unlawful human experiments. 43-year-old Russian businesswoman, Svetlana Ivanov, was apprehended by authorities this morning after underground laboratories, housing dead bodies, were discovered beneath factories and shipment companies owned by Ivanov. Authorities also found cultic artifacts and documents on black magic inside the laboratories. The factories producing the Lucid beer were shut down immediately by authorities and shipments to the U.S. and other countries were terminated. The government has issued a worldwide recall of early Lucid shipments to store retailers. Millions of stores across the U.S. and other countries are moving quickly to remove the Lucid beer brand off their shelves. Authorities are advising people, especially women, not to consume the Lucid beverage if they’ve already purchased it. If you have consumed Lucid, report to the nearest hospital for treatment as soon as possible.) Justin was so distracted by the freakish news reports that he couldn’t feel his daughter’s little fingers touching his nose ring. The young man kept reading one strange news report after another. (A teenage girl attacked a worker at a grocery store. Witnesses say the girl bit a store employee in the neck before throwing the employee through a window. People evacuated the store when the girl started chasing customers. One witness reported that the girl looked like a Whitewalker from Game of Thrones and that her mouth stretched open abnormally while she was screaming at customers and employees.) (A 14-year-old boy reported to police that he awoke to see a pale-skinned woman standing in his bedroom. The teenager told police that the woman stood at the foot of his bed with blood covering her blouse and jeans. The teen also told the authorities that the woman pointed at him and said, “the fresh meat of a baby is the best meat.” The teen reported that the woman’s skin and hair had no pigmentation. He said she had the body of a bony elderly woman and that the whites of her eyes were blacker than ink. The boy barely escaped with his life, but he believes the blood he saw on the woman’s clothes was the blood of his father and his older brother.) Jake had to take his eyes away from his phone for a minute. He had to allow his brain to process the news reports. What unnerved Jake was that he no longer heard the screams coming from the hospital floor’s upper level. It was dead silent outside the elevator. “Daddy, I think the screaming stopped,” Abigail whispered while still holding her father’s hand. “Yeah, I don’t hear anything,” Justin said. There was a fearful undertone in Justin’s voice. The young man’s pierced ears tried to detect an ounce of sound from behind the elevator doors, but he received nothing but an unearthly silence. Justin waited to hear something and after three long minutes, he finally heard a sound. The ringing of his phone almost caused him to jump out of his skin. Even Abigail let out a brief scream when she heard her daddy’s loud ringtone. “Goddamn,” Justin whispered out forcefully while struggling to answer his phone. The young man breathed deeply when he saw that it was his wife calling him. “Hello, Angela? Baby, are you okay?” Justin waited to hear his wife’s reply, but instead, he was greeted by what sounded like a woman letting out a low growl. The young man snatched his phone away from his ear in horror. “No,” Justin whispered down to his phone before releasing a heartbroken gasp. He brought his phone back up to his ear only to find out that the person on the other end disconnected the call. “Was that Mommy?” Abigail whispered with her fingers touching her daddy's long dreadlocks. Within a second, her question stirred up tears in her father. Justin turned away from his daughter, catching a tear with his thumb before it could drip down his nose. “No Sweetie, that wasn’t Mommy. It was a wrong number.” Justin didn’t want to lie to his daughter, but he felt that he had to. He didn’t have the heart to tell his little girl that her mom was now a white zombie. Justin knew what happened to his wife. He heard it on the other end of his phone. That low growl burned deep into Justin’s psyche. The thing he heard on the other end of his phone was no longer his wife. Justin didn’t want to think about that disconcerting low growl that emerged out of his phone. He wanted to hear his wife’s voice again. Desperate to hear his wife’s voice, he played her last voicemail. (“Hello Sugar, it’s your wife calling to see how your hospital visit is going. I still can’t believe you wanted to visit a guy who bullied you in high school, but whatever. Anyway, I’m so excited about your Grammy nomination for best rap album! I know you didn’t want me to type up your acceptance speech, but I did it anyway. You deserve the Grammy because you’re sweet. I know you’re gonna win. We’re gonna have so much fun at the Grammy after-party. I want you to know that if you don’t win the Grammy, I won’t give a damn, because I already have something more beautiful than a Grammy, and that’s you! I love you babydoll and I want you to tell my little angel that mommy said hi. Tell her that mommy loves her and that she can’t wait to see her later on today. Tonight we’re gonna celebrate your Grammy nomination. For dinner, I’m cooking a special Mediterranean seafood dish that you’re going to love. I also found this new fruit-flavored beer called Lucid, which I think will go well with our dinner tonight. They have different flavors. I bought a six-pack of a flavor called Morocco Raspberry. It’s an interesting looking beer and it has zero calories. I’m thinking about tasting one now. I need a beer to help me unwind. Your wife is tired! Sitting in a recording studio all day is hellish, but that’s the life of a music producer. I just left the store and I’m on my way home. I got everything for dinner and I got our new Lucid beer. I can’t wait to see you and our little girl. I know you drove your Lamborghini Aventador to the hospital. It would’ve been safer to take the Escalade, but that’s alright. All I got to say is don’t drive too fast on your way back home. I know Abigail loves riding in her daddy’s sports car, but I still don’t think that car is safe for a 4-year-old. Just be careful. I’ll see you and Abigail tonight. Tell your former high school buddy that I said hi. I hope his surgery turned out okay. Gotta go! Goodbye, Sugar!”) Justin didn’t want his wife’s voicemail to end, but it had to. He tried to gather himself as he gazed at his daughter. The young man smiled at his little girl and he told himself not to shed a single tear in front of her. Justin wanted to be brave for his daughter. “Are you okay, Daddy?” Abigail kept patting her father’s hand and she could sense a sadness from her daddy, even though he was smiling at her. “Yeah Honey, I’m fine,” Justin answered his daughter before resting his lips on her forehead. He chuckled a little from feeling his daughter’s fingers tickling his beard. Justin still had his daughter, and he didn’t want to lose her like he lost his wife. The father and daughter held each other while sitting in the dark. Justin used his daughter’s hair as a pillow while Abigail fidgeted with the gold necklace that decorated her daddy’s neck. The little girl loved being between her father’s arms. She would see her father as a superhero because of his Herculean physique. Sometimes Abigail would study the bulky, rigid muscles in her father’s arms and she would count the tattoos on his skin. Abigail didn’t like the dark, but being in her father’s arms made her forget about the darkness. After six dreadfully long hours, the power finally came back on and the elevator was moving again. It only took a second for the elevator to reach the hospital’s underground parking garage. The dead silence still followed Justin and his daughter after they left the elevator. Justin carried his daughter while tip-toeing between parked cars. He tried not to imagine running into a pale woman. The building’s power came back online, but it seemed like the underground garage was just as dark as the elevator. Justin needed to find his car and he kept getting a sense that him and his daughter were being followed by someone, or something. The young man kept peering over his shoulder every second. Justin didn’t like the dead silence. He preferred to hear screaming so he could hear a sound, and this made him feel guilty. All Justin could hear was his heavy breathing and his daughter’s breathing. He could feel his warm sweat saturating his black muscle shirt. Justin couldn’t believe he was sweating so much. He felt like he had just finished doing a live concert. Justin sweated less when he was on stage in front of his fans. It took forever, but Justin finally spotted his gold Lamborghini. The sports car was parked beside a Jeep. Justin pulled his car keys out of his pocket. He was about to make his way toward his car, but he heard a loud click behind his head. Justin knew that sound. “Daddy?” Abigail whimpered when she saw a wounded man standing behind her father with a gun aimed at the back of his head. “It’s okay, Baby.” Justin comforted his daughter while keeping his cool. “Take it easy, man,” Justin said as he calmly turned around to confront the gunman. He observed the gunman’s biker thug appearance. “If you want my wallet, you can have it.” Justin pulled his wallet out slowly. He saw the man’s injury and it looked like something took a chunk out of his shoulder. “I don’t want money! I’m sorry, but I need your car!” The man’s deep voice trembled like an earthquake. He glared at Justin and his truck-sized body was more intimidating than his 9mm handgun. “I can’t give you my car.” Justin knew there’d be trouble after he said that. He covered his daughter’s head when the man brought his gun closer. “My car won’t start and I need to get out of here to see my daughter. You’re a dad, so you should understand!” The man spoke through gritted teeth. “Give me your car keys! Please don’t make me ask you again!” The man tightened his grip on the handle of his gun. His finger hugged the trigger as he brought his handgun even closer to Justin’s bearded face. Abigail moaned and whimpered as she looked at the light reflecting off the man’s pistol. The girl’s eyes welled up with tears when she thought the man was going to shoot her father. But within a few seconds, Abigail watched her father do something amazing. Justin made his move and he knocked the gun out of the man’s hand. The man shoved Justin back and he tried to go for his gun, but he fell on his back from a hard blow to his face. Justin punched the man while securely holding his daughter with one arm. It amazed him how he could knock down a guy who was a little bigger than him. Justin went to pick up the man’s gun. When he turned back around, his heart went into his throat when he saw a pale woman standing over the man. The woman’s skin was pulled back over her bones. Her hair and skin were whiter than milk. The woman’s eyes were darker than her black dress. Justin watched as the bony woman revealed her dingy, pointy teeth before jumping on the man, taking a bite out of his throat. He could see a beer bottle in her hand that said Lucid. Justin also saw a wedding ring on her finger and a rose tattoo on her hand. When Justin saw the tattoo, he knew the monster was his wife.
Justin could hear people screaming outside the elevator doors. It all started when the power went out. Justin had his 4-year-old daughter, Abigail, on the elevator with him. The young man had to be brave for his little girl. Something terrible was happening. At first, Justin felt lost, until he pulled out his phone and saw the news headlines. (A woman killed her fiance at a local nightclub. Witnesses say the woman decapitated him with her fingernails and teeth. Authorities shot the woman, killing her. But she came back to life hours later during an autopsy. The medical examiner escaped, but the woman killed his assistant.) (A woman turned into a white zombie after consuming an alcoholic beverage. She attacked two pedestrians and was shot down by police, but came back to life a few minutes later.) (Four women attacked a daycare center after leaving a local bar. Witnesses say the four women had snow-white skin and hair. The daycare’s security guards shot all four women, but now their bodies are missing from the Saint Augustine mortuary.) (A woman gets attacked by a deformed woman while out jogging. The victim reported that the woman had white skin and hair with black eyes. Doctors found traces of an alcoholic substance on the victim’s neck where the attacker bit her. The victim’s wounds were treated at the Saint Augustine hospital, but her hair and skin turned white as snow a few hours later. The infected victim became irate. She killed a nurse and two doctors before breaking out of the hospital.) These were the surreal news reports Justin read on his phone. He almost dropped his phone when he read the first news report. “Daddy, what’s going on?” Abigail’s sweet voice broke her father out of his frightened daze. Justin unglued his eyes from his phone screen. “I don’t know, Sweetie,” the man spoke to his daughter through a distressed half-whisper. Justin had his daughter in his arms while sitting on the elevator’s floor. It was dark in the elevator, but Justin could still see his daughter’s dollish face and the little sunflowers on her dress. “Is mommy gonna be okay?” Abigail mumbled. She held her daddy’s hand while laying her head against his chest. The little girl found comfort in listening to her father’s heartbeats. “Yeah, Baby, your mommy’s gonna be fine.” Justin assured his daughter. He tried to shut out the screaming by focusing on keeping his daughter comforted. “You wanna play Pattycake like we did last night!” Justin whispered excitedly to his daughter. The father did his best to take his daughter’s attention away from the screams. He laughed softly when his daughter nodded her head. The father and daughter quickly went into their Pattycake game. Justin tried to block out the screams while playing with his daughter. He also tried to block out the unreal news headlines he saw on his phone. Justin felt like he was in a horror movie. “Can you rap for me, Daddy? Abigail asked. The little girl loved it when her father would rap to her while playing Pattycake. Abigail’s father was a British rap star who sold three albums over the last five years. Instead of having a bedtime story read to her, Justin would rap to his daughter after tucking her into bed. Abigail enjoyed the last bedtime story her father told her the night before through his rapping style. The story was about a queen who fell in love with an imprisoned ninja warrior. “You want Daddy to rap for you?” Justin chuckled. The young man’s whispering and his English accent soothed his daughter. “Pretty baby with the sunshine smile. Brighter than a star with your explosive style. Your eyes like butterflies in the spring. Daddy can’t believe God blessed him with this cute little thing. You make a diamond jealous of your sparkling hair. Your little pretty face is like porcelain and your skin, so fair. When you grow up, girls are gonna hate. Their boyfriends are gonna chase your beauty, constantly asking for a date. When you grow up, you’ll find a guy and he better treat you right. If he doesn’t, yo Daddy’s gonna hunt him down and beat him in a fight. If you choose to have babies, you’ll be a wonderful mother like your mom, who loves you. She loves you more than anything in the world, and your daddy does too. Like a blooming flower. From a princess to a queen. You’re gonna always be Mommy and Daddy’s little goddess supreme.” Justin watched as his daughter gave him a glowing wide grin of approval. He loved how his little girl would give him the biggest smile every time he’d rap to her. Justin received a kiss on his curly beard from his daughter and he returned the favor, kissing his little girl on the tip of her nose. Justin wanted to keep playing Pattycake with his daughter, but his phone kept interrupting him. He kissed his daughter again while pulling his phone out. More news headlines bombarded Justin’s phone. (An 11-year-old girl escaped from her house after her mother attempted to kill her. The girl says that she found her mother in the basement naked and eating their dog. The girl also says that she found her father’s body in the bathroom with his throat ripped open. The girl’s mother became deformed after drinking a fruit-flavored beer called Lucid. The girl says her mother’s eyes were pitch black. She also reported to authorities that her mother’s body became anorexic and her skin and hair looked like snow.) (Police arrested the CEO of a Moscow beer manufacturer called Lucid for unlawful human experiments. 43-year-old Russian businesswoman, Svetlana Ivanova, was apprehended by authorities this morning after underground laboratories, housing dead bodies, were discovered beneath factories and shipment companies owned by Ivanova. Authorities also found cultic artifacts and documents on black magic inside the laboratories. The factories producing the Lucid beer were shut down immediately by authorities and shipments to the U.S. and other countries were terminated. The government has issued a worldwide recall of early Lucid shipments to store retailers. Millions of stores across the U.S. and other countries are moving quickly to remove the Lucid beer brand off their shelves. Authorities are advising people, especially women, not to consume the Lucid beverage if they’ve already purchased it. If you have consumed Lucid, report to the nearest hospital for treatment as soon as possible.) Justin was so distracted by the freakish news reports that he couldn’t feel his daughter’s little fingers touching his nose ring. The young man kept reading one strange news report after another. (A teenage girl attacked a worker at a grocery store. Witnesses say the girl bit a store employee in the neck before throwing the employee through a window. People evacuated the store when the girl started chasing customers. One witness reported that the girl looked like a Whitewalker from Game of Thrones and that her mouth stretched open abnormally while she was screaming at customers and employees.) (A 14-year-old boy reported to police that he awoke to see a pale-skinned woman standing in his bedroom. The teenager told police that the woman stood at the foot of his bed with blood covering her blouse and jeans. The teen also told the authorities that the woman pointed at him and said, “the fresh meat of a baby is the best meat.” The teen reported that the woman’s skin and hair had no pigmentation. He said she had the body of a bony elderly woman and that the whites of her eyes were blacker than ink. The boy barely escaped with his life, but he believes the blood he saw on the woman’s clothes was the blood of his father and his older brother.) Jake had to take his eyes away from his phone for a minute. He had to allow his brain to process the news reports. What unnerved Jake was that he no longer heard the screams coming from the hospital floor’s upper level. It was dead silent outside the elevator. “Daddy, I think the screaming stopped,” Abigail whispered while still holding her father’s hand. “Yeah, I don’t hear anything,” Justin said. There was a fearful undertone in Justin’s voice. The young man’s pierced ears tried to detect an ounce of sound from behind the elevator doors, but he received nothing but an unearthly silence. Justin waited to hear something and after three long minutes, he finally heard a sound. The ringing of his phone almost caused him to jump out of his skin. Even Abigail let out a brief scream when she heard her daddy’s loud ringtone. “Goddamn,” Justin whispered out forcefully while struggling to answer his phone. The young man breathed deeply when he saw that it was his wife calling him. “Hello, Angela? Baby, are you okay?” Justin waited to hear his wife’s reply, but instead, he was greeted by what sounded like a woman letting out a low growl. The young man snatched his phone away from his ear in horror. “No,” Justin whispered down to his phone before releasing a heartbroken gasp. He brought his phone back up to his ear only to find out that the person on the other end disconnected the call. “Was that Mommy?” Abigail whispered with her fingers touching her daddy's long dreadlocks. Within a second, her question stirred up tears in her father. Justin turned away from his daughter, catching a tear with his thumb before it could drip down his nose. “No Sweetie, that wasn’t Mommy. It was a wrong number.” Justin didn’t want to lie to his daughter, but he felt that he had to. He didn’t have the heart to tell his little girl that her mom was now a white zombie. Justin knew what happened to his wife. He heard it on the other end of his phone. That low growl burned deep into Justin’s psyche. The thing he heard on the other end of his phone was no longer his wife. Justin didn’t want to think about that disconcerting low growl that emerged out of his phone. He wanted to hear his wife’s voice again. Desperate to hear his wife’s voice, he played her last voicemail. (“Hello Sugar, it’s your wife calling to see how your hospital visit is going. I still can’t believe you wanted to visit a guy who bullied you in high school, but whatever. Anyway, I’m so excited about your Grammy nomination for best rap album! I know you didn’t want me to type up your acceptance speech, but I did it anyway. You deserve the Grammy because you’re sweet. I know you’re gonna win. We’re gonna have so much fun at the Grammy after-party. I want you to know that if you don’t win the Grammy, I won’t give a damn, because I already have something more beautiful than a Grammy, and that’s you! I love you babydoll and I want you to tell my little angel that mommy said hi. Tell her that mommy loves her and that she can’t wait to see her later on today. Tonight we’re gonna celebrate your Grammy nomination. For dinner, I’m cooking a special Mediterranean seafood dish that you’re going to love. I also found this new fruit-flavored beer called Lucid, which I think will go well with our dinner tonight. They have different flavors. I bought a six-pack of a flavor called Morocco Raspberry. It’s an interesting looking beer and it has zero calories. I’m thinking about tasting one now. I need a beer to help me unwind. Your wife is tired! Sitting in a recording studio all day is hellish, but that’s the life of a music producer. I just left the store and I’m on my way home. I got everything for dinner and I got our new Lucid beer. I can’t wait to see you and our little girl. I know you drove your Lamborghini Aventador to the hospital. It would’ve been safer to take the Escalade, but that’s alright. All I got to say is don’t drive too fast on your way back home. I know Abigail loves riding in her daddy’s sports car, but I still don’t think that car is safe for a 4-year-old. Just be careful. I’ll see you and Abigail tonight. Tell your former high school buddy that I said hi. I hope his surgery turned out okay. Gotta go! Goodbye, Sugar!”) Justin didn’t want his wife’s voicemail to end, but it had to. He tried to gather himself as he gazed at his daughter. The young man smiled at his little girl and he told himself not to shed a single tear in front of her. Justin wanted to be brave for his daughter. “Are you okay, Daddy?” Abigail kept patting her father’s hand and she could sense a sadness from her daddy, even though he was smiling at her. “Yeah Honey, I’m fine,” Justin answered his daughter before resting his lips on her forehead. He chuckled a little from feeling his daughter’s fingers tickling his beard. Justin still had his daughter, and he didn’t want to lose her like he lost his wife. The father and daughter held each other while sitting in the dark. Justin used his daughter’s hair as a pillow while Abigail fidgeted with the gold necklace that decorated her daddy’s neck. The little girl loved being between her father’s arms. She would see her father as a superhero because of his Herculean physique. Sometimes Abigail would study the bulky, rigid muscles in her father’s arms and she would count the tattoos on his skin. Abigail didn’t like the dark, but being in her father’s arms made her forget about the darkness. After six dreadfully long hours, the power finally came back on and the elevator was moving again. It only took a second for the elevator to reach the hospital’s underground parking garage. The dead silence still followed Justin and his daughter after they left the elevator. Justin carried his daughter while tip-toeing between parked cars. He tried not to imagine running into a pale woman. The building’s power came back online, but it seemed like the underground garage was just as dark as the elevator. Justin needed to find his car and he kept getting a sense that him and his daughter were being followed by someone, or something. The young man kept peering over his shoulder every second. Justin didn’t like the dead silence. He preferred to hear screaming so he could hear a sound, and this made him feel guilty. All Justin could hear was his heavy breathing and his daughter’s breathing. He could feel his warm sweat saturating his black muscle shirt. Justin couldn’t believe he was sweating so much. He felt like he had just finished doing a live concert. Justin sweated less when he was on stage in front of his fans. It took forever, but Justin finally spotted his gold Lamborghini. The sports car was parked beside a Jeep. Justin pulled his car keys out of his pocket. He was about to make his way toward his car, but he heard a loud click behind his head. Justin knew that sound. “Daddy?” Abigail whimpered when she saw a wounded man standing behind her father with a gun aimed at the back of his head. “It’s okay, Baby.” Justin comforted his daughter while keeping his cool. “Take it easy, man,” Justin said as he calmly turned around to confront the gunman. He observed the gunman’s biker thug appearance. “If you want my wallet, you can have it.” Justin pulled his wallet out slowly. He saw the man’s injury and it looked like something took a chunk out of his shoulder. “I don’t want money! I’m sorry, but I need your car!” The man’s deep voice trembled like an earthquake. He glared at Justin and his truck-sized body was more intimidating than his 9mm handgun. “I can’t give you my car.” Justin knew there’d be trouble after he said that. He covered his daughter’s head when the man brought his gun closer. “My car won’t start and I need to get out of here to see my daughter. You’re a dad, so you should understand!” The man spoke through gritted teeth. “Give me your car keys! Please don’t make me ask you again!” The man tightened his grip on the handle of his gun. His finger hugged the trigger as he brought his handgun even closer to Justin’s bearded face. Abigail moaned and whimpered as she looked at the light reflecting off the man’s pistol. The girl’s eyes welled up with tears when she thought the man was going to shoot her father. But within a few seconds, Abigail watched her father do something amazing. Justin made his move and he knocked the gun out of the man’s hand. The man shoved Justin back and he tried to go for his gun, but he fell on his back from a hard blow to his face. Justin punched the man while securely holding his daughter with one arm. It amazed him how he could knock down a guy who was a little bigger than him. Justin went to pick up the man’s gun. When he turned back around, his heart went into his throat when he saw a pale woman standing over the man. The woman’s skin was pulled back over her bones. Her hair and skin were whiter than milk. The woman’s eyes were darker than her black dress. Justin watched as the bony woman revealed her dingy, pointy teeth before jumping on the man, taking a bite out of his throat. He could see a beer bottle in her hand that said Lucid. Justin also saw a wedding ring on her finger and a rose tattoo on her hand. When Justin saw the tattoo, he knew the monster was his wife.
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Full Playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL54AD7ADC40053330 - - Like these Sex and Dating lessons !!! Check out the official app http://apple.co/... We're back! Don't be a casual: http://bit.ly/DanPlanSubscribe Today we talk about relationships in highschool. Dating is confusing, anything arranging from b... Full Playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL54AD7ADC40053330 - - Like these Sex and Dating lessons !!! Check out the official app http://apple.co/... Full Playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL54AD7ADC40053330 - - Like these Sex and Dating lessons !!! Check out the official app http://apple.co/... Dating advice for high schoolers is one of my most requested videos! Today we talk about all the dating tips I learned during high school so hopefully these ... How to Flirt with a Guy in High School Teen Dating Tips - Duration: 1:45. Howcast 687,064 views. 1:45. How to Turn a Friend into a Girlfriend Teen Dating Tips - Duration: 1:35. SUBSCRIBE: http://bit.ly/1n8gZdY FACEBOOK: http://on.fb.me/1mTdyeB TWITTER: http://bit.ly/1g8cydA INSTAGRAM: http://bit.ly/1eSx7OX For collaborations and bus... Teenage relationship advice I wish I knew. So recently I got a few people wanting me to talk about teenage relationship. I might get like 12 teenagers who wa... I just launched TEEN MOM UNIVERSITY! Learn from myself & experts on how to survive Teen Parenting and how to go from welfare to wealth, and become an incredi...